Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Something That Worked

This is the fragment of black cotton that I bleach discharged in the sink, was it two weeks ago?  Seems like.  I have it hanging on the towel bar over the tub in my bathroom.  I like the way it looks.  This is about 18 by 24 inches.  It has the look of an abstract X-ray.  It will be even more mysterious when cut up and sewn to other, more normal (even commercial), fabrics.

I weighed myself this morning and started to cry.  Sobbing.  I have no idea what I am doing wrong, as I am just doing what I always do, and have done for 10 months now, I even gave up nuts. Mysteriously, I feel lighter and smaller. My clothing is not getting tighter. But.  The number on the scale continues to inch upwards and not down. Well, at times it goes down.  Then bounces right back up, plus some, like a good swift gut punch.  I am trying to stay positive.  Today's exercise is drinking a cup of water every hour.  I know I don't drink enough water.  So, I intend to force myself to drink water.  Even if I gag.  Two cups so far.  I have set the oven timer to remind me.

It is supposed to be overcast and raining.  Instead the sun is shining and the sky is clear blue.  I have the day off.  Riley is out on the deck.  So are the citrus trees.  I moved everyone from the upstair bathroom to the porch.  Later today, I will move them onto the enclosed porch for the night.  I also gave them fertilizer. And a huge drink of water.  I had intended for the rain to wash and hydrate the little trees.  Lemon, oranges and now a lime.  The gardenia is also outdoors.  It didn't die over the winter.  I've had it for a year now, which is amazing.  My overwintered (indoors) lavender plants have sent up flower spikes.  The Lily of the Nile (agapanthus) are growing exuberantly in the upstairs bedroom (50 degrees and skylights).  I must be treating everything with the correct mixture of care and neglect.

I will be working everyday for the next four.  I need to plan ahead for my lunches and for G's dinners.  So a visit to the grocery.  I can go today or wait and stop on the way home from work tomorrow (at 3).  I have things I can use to make a lovely Ragu I read about on FOOD52 Digest.  It was in the post regarding freezer food.  G would like a nice porky ragu.  I also have a huge bag (2.5 pounds) of chicken breasts in the freezer than I should be using.  Where are they hiding?  I was going to make "Not Rabbit With Mustard Sauce".  Well, I found the chicken and set it in the fridge portion of the fridge to thaw slowly.  I think I will wait until tomorrow to buy eggs, cereal and yogurt.

I want to do something.  Something that isn't on my To Do List.  Something that I will enjoy.  Been so long since I did that, that I have no idea what it would be.  I'll let you know.

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