It's raining and the sky is dark. We haven't even "fallen back" on the time yet and it's dark. I have my oatmeal in the microwave and the coffee is ready (the bean grinder gave out, good thing we had another, waiting). I'm going to work. I am sleepy.
Today I'm "teaching" Beds To Rest. We think we will have 25 students. How to prepare your garden, shrubs etc for the coming winter. Halloween. Who will be in costume?
Working three days again next week. Sunday instead of Saturday. This is probably the way it will be until Christmas Eve. I'm already thinking about the months of winter when I will not be working. Wondering about all those days and weeks here alone.
G's eye exam was extensive and the doctor found nothing to suggest that he had the beginnings of macular degeneration. We are thankful for that. In fact, all the surfaces of G's inner eye looked normal. I had to drive home. Change lanes etc in rush hour (for Maine) traffic. It would have been awful, but G was telling me which lane I should be in so that made it better. I don't enjoy driving. I hate the type of traffic where everyone is changing lanes and going too fast.
Leo died on West Wing in the episode I watched last night. John Spencer died suddenly in real life so it was real and fiction at the same time. Very sad. No more episodes until after work on Monday. Hard to wait. I have two good books waiting for me at the library. Perhaps G will remember to pick them up?
I grilled steaks last night and fried potatoes and onions to go along. It was very good. We don't have steak very often. I also steamed fresh broccoli. We ate while watching the news and NCIS repeats.
I have to pack my lunch, pour my coffee and get moving. My day has begun.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
How I Have Missed YOU!
Let me count the ways! Our Comcast internet has been off for a few days and then our modem refused to reboot, so today is my first day, this week, with any internet connection. I will admit to sitting here, in front of the laptop, just staring. Lost and forlorn.
It's amazing to realize how much a part of each day I spend here typing, reading, searching, checking for messages. Until it's gone. A cautionary tale?
Yesterday, I had lunch with a friend. A local restaurant has moved to a new, larger space in the new buildings at Maine Street Station (we are hoping to have train service someday to Portland and Boston like we had in the "olden days"). The new space is not being used to it's best advantage and the ceilings are high which makes it VERY noisy inside. Crowded, jumbled and noisy. Service was great though and the food is the same as it's always been. Too little for too much money. My personal sized pizza with cheese and sliced tomato was $9.95. (pizzas with more stuff were $13.95) A very small half sandwich with very fresh vegetable ingredients was $5.95. Barely enough food and it looked stingy on the plate. Think what $5.95 would buy at Subway, McDonald's or even at the local sandwich/bakery place. And the seating area wouldn't be all jumbled and loud. Just saying is all. I don't think my town would want me to write restaurant reviews. A new Japanese restaurant opened this past week in the downtown section. The two times I've walked past it had one or two customers seated and a working staff of at least 6 to 8 standing around. I'm guessing it's too expensive. Opening after the tourist season is not the smartest thing to do. Cash flow.
When I wasn't able to post I had so many great ideas for posts. Now that I'm back, I can't remember any of them. Why didn't I write them down?
Top Chef last night was another disappointment. They had two hours to make a vegetarian tasting meal for Natalie Portman and some of her friends. They had postage stamp portions of sliced radishes and smears of pureed vegetables. It would all have fit in a large tablespoon. And one guy couldn't even braise small leeks properly in 2 hours. And others didn't even get all the food they made on the plates. On the Top Chef Masters series, the chefs had to prepare a vegetarian/gluten free menu and they made fantastic food in good sized portions. Bayless even made a mole sauce. Poached leeks with radish slices? For dinner? One chef made polenta and mixed in some bananas. He came in second. The winning recipe was a pile of smoked, sauteed kale. And I think it won because he served up a large pile of it and it was filling and they were all still hungry. Kevin and Michael are the best chefs in the contest. Bryan can be good and he can be awful. I wouldn't eat in any of their restaurants.
I miss Project Runway every week. I couldn't even tell you what day and time it is aired. It is so awful. And, remember, it was the highpoint of my viewing week, for many years.
West Wing is nearing the end (but good news, it is starting over, so I can see the year I missed) and I finally know what Deborah and Helen wanted to tell me. John Spencer died during production. In real life. I had been thinking he died in the story line. But now fiction must follow real life. How sad. And Josh kissed what's her name. Donna. Finally. And Tobey has started talking to Josh again. And CJ is having parts of a dinner with Danny. I don't know if I would have enjoyed watching West Wing when it originally aired, but it has been glorious to watch this summer and fall. I even watched for two hours every morning while in Atlanta. And now I get to see the pilot and the first season. I may even watch the whole thing again. Helen and Dennis have watched it several times. I can watch into the winter.
Today we are driving to Lewiston. G has an eye appointment. He may have the beginnings of macular degeneration. I read that Georgia O'Keeffe developed macular degeneration in the 1970's and continued to paint and do sculpture, using her peripheral vision and the help of an assistant. G doesn't like vegetables so he will refuse to eat the brightly colored vegetables that can slow the progression. Bright red peppers, broccoli, carrots, winter squash, kale and beets. All the things I eat and love.
I had my glasses frames adjusted yesterday. Seriously out of whack. It was a pleasure to stitch my circles and squares last night. I could SEE.
Today I am taking a book to read and my circles with me to the eye doctor. I have to drive us home as G will be having his eyes dilated. The Jeep is finally back to normal. We still have to pick up the "clean up chemicals" to pour over the fluids that leaked in the garage. It's quite smelly. Toxic. And we can't let the dog out through the garage. I would like to visit BJ's while we are in that part of Maine (free 2 month membership) and buy large containers of stuff. But we may not have time and G may not be feeling like doing any shopping.
I bought more apples to make applesauce. And I have more country pork ribs for dinner tonight with baked potatoes and steamed green beans. And Survivor is on and K might call and I can find out if she sold any windows last week. Her new job.
My bowl today is filled with sunshine and golden leaves.
It's amazing to realize how much a part of each day I spend here typing, reading, searching, checking for messages. Until it's gone. A cautionary tale?
Yesterday, I had lunch with a friend. A local restaurant has moved to a new, larger space in the new buildings at Maine Street Station (we are hoping to have train service someday to Portland and Boston like we had in the "olden days"). The new space is not being used to it's best advantage and the ceilings are high which makes it VERY noisy inside. Crowded, jumbled and noisy. Service was great though and the food is the same as it's always been. Too little for too much money. My personal sized pizza with cheese and sliced tomato was $9.95. (pizzas with more stuff were $13.95) A very small half sandwich with very fresh vegetable ingredients was $5.95. Barely enough food and it looked stingy on the plate. Think what $5.95 would buy at Subway, McDonald's or even at the local sandwich/bakery place. And the seating area wouldn't be all jumbled and loud. Just saying is all. I don't think my town would want me to write restaurant reviews. A new Japanese restaurant opened this past week in the downtown section. The two times I've walked past it had one or two customers seated and a working staff of at least 6 to 8 standing around. I'm guessing it's too expensive. Opening after the tourist season is not the smartest thing to do. Cash flow.
When I wasn't able to post I had so many great ideas for posts. Now that I'm back, I can't remember any of them. Why didn't I write them down?
Top Chef last night was another disappointment. They had two hours to make a vegetarian tasting meal for Natalie Portman and some of her friends. They had postage stamp portions of sliced radishes and smears of pureed vegetables. It would all have fit in a large tablespoon. And one guy couldn't even braise small leeks properly in 2 hours. And others didn't even get all the food they made on the plates. On the Top Chef Masters series, the chefs had to prepare a vegetarian/gluten free menu and they made fantastic food in good sized portions. Bayless even made a mole sauce. Poached leeks with radish slices? For dinner? One chef made polenta and mixed in some bananas. He came in second. The winning recipe was a pile of smoked, sauteed kale. And I think it won because he served up a large pile of it and it was filling and they were all still hungry. Kevin and Michael are the best chefs in the contest. Bryan can be good and he can be awful. I wouldn't eat in any of their restaurants.
I miss Project Runway every week. I couldn't even tell you what day and time it is aired. It is so awful. And, remember, it was the highpoint of my viewing week, for many years.
West Wing is nearing the end (but good news, it is starting over, so I can see the year I missed) and I finally know what Deborah and Helen wanted to tell me. John Spencer died during production. In real life. I had been thinking he died in the story line. But now fiction must follow real life. How sad. And Josh kissed what's her name. Donna. Finally. And Tobey has started talking to Josh again. And CJ is having parts of a dinner with Danny. I don't know if I would have enjoyed watching West Wing when it originally aired, but it has been glorious to watch this summer and fall. I even watched for two hours every morning while in Atlanta. And now I get to see the pilot and the first season. I may even watch the whole thing again. Helen and Dennis have watched it several times. I can watch into the winter.
Today we are driving to Lewiston. G has an eye appointment. He may have the beginnings of macular degeneration. I read that Georgia O'Keeffe developed macular degeneration in the 1970's and continued to paint and do sculpture, using her peripheral vision and the help of an assistant. G doesn't like vegetables so he will refuse to eat the brightly colored vegetables that can slow the progression. Bright red peppers, broccoli, carrots, winter squash, kale and beets. All the things I eat and love.
I had my glasses frames adjusted yesterday. Seriously out of whack. It was a pleasure to stitch my circles and squares last night. I could SEE.
Today I am taking a book to read and my circles with me to the eye doctor. I have to drive us home as G will be having his eyes dilated. The Jeep is finally back to normal. We still have to pick up the "clean up chemicals" to pour over the fluids that leaked in the garage. It's quite smelly. Toxic. And we can't let the dog out through the garage. I would like to visit BJ's while we are in that part of Maine (free 2 month membership) and buy large containers of stuff. But we may not have time and G may not be feeling like doing any shopping.
I bought more apples to make applesauce. And I have more country pork ribs for dinner tonight with baked potatoes and steamed green beans. And Survivor is on and K might call and I can find out if she sold any windows last week. Her new job.
My bowl today is filled with sunshine and golden leaves.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Early Sunday Morning
I fell asleep, while watching a chef roast a chicken in maple syrup, last night. On the couch. Woke up at 11:30 and went to bed. I have been "taking advantage" of working the afternoon shift and have been staying up later at night. And, in doing that, have messed up my sleep patterns. So I'm up early on Sunday morning.
It's not raining. Yet. The lawn is covered with golden yellow leaves. The darker, thicker brown leaves of the oaks are still on the trees. My rigorous removal of white pines from my yard has also decreased the amount of pine needles. My pumpkin is on the front porch.
I checked my TiVo line up for West Wing (and read the little blurbs about each episode) so I was correct in thinking Leo dies and Santos is elected president. I have 14 episodes in my future. And the BEST news is that after all this, the very first episode (pilot) from 1999 is scheduled. I missed the first year. So I am VERY happy.
I plan to work on my circles and squares, do laundry, iron shirts and possibly go out for Mexican food. I think the Patriots are playing so we may have to rethink the Mexican food. G will walk the dog and take a nap. I will also pay bills and balance the checkbook. And read my neighbor's New York Times. We are collecting her papers while she is gone for a few days and she lets us read them.
My bowl today is available for anything that comes it's way. Or nothing.
It's not raining. Yet. The lawn is covered with golden yellow leaves. The darker, thicker brown leaves of the oaks are still on the trees. My rigorous removal of white pines from my yard has also decreased the amount of pine needles. My pumpkin is on the front porch.
I checked my TiVo line up for West Wing (and read the little blurbs about each episode) so I was correct in thinking Leo dies and Santos is elected president. I have 14 episodes in my future. And the BEST news is that after all this, the very first episode (pilot) from 1999 is scheduled. I missed the first year. So I am VERY happy.
I plan to work on my circles and squares, do laundry, iron shirts and possibly go out for Mexican food. I think the Patriots are playing so we may have to rethink the Mexican food. G will walk the dog and take a nap. I will also pay bills and balance the checkbook. And read my neighbor's New York Times. We are collecting her papers while she is gone for a few days and she lets us read them.
My bowl today is available for anything that comes it's way. Or nothing.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
When You Try And Blog Everyday
You get the dreck with the golden nuggets. I apologize in advance for not being able to be witty, deep and hilarious 24/7/52. You should be thankful this blog has a "delete" button. I am.
Today it rained. And it was cold. And we had to help people carve pumpkins. And a guy actually thought there was going to be a LECTURE on how to carve a pumpkin. And he walked out when he was told we were ACTUALLY CARVING REAL PUMPKINS and not just talking about carving pumpkins. And N (my co carver) was forced to come get me at one point, because if she had to spend another minute alone with the three women carving pumpkins, she was going to stab herself with the pumpkin carving tool. Women. We though we were doing this for CHILDREN! Finally, after lunch, some children arrived. An 8 year old showed us his "signature" uni-brow pumpkin design.
I left work at 2:30 to meet Deborah (of the blog in the sidebar) while she is visiting Maine. Great visit. And I got to see all her 12 by 12 pieces in person and her daily Lent pieces. I, of course, had forgotten to bring my pieces. I was just so excited to see her, I forgot everything else.
Got home at the same time as G and noticed a funny smell in the garage. The newly repaired Jeep had leaked ALL it's transmission fluid onto the garage floor. If we had been driving it, we would have ruined the transmission. And we have a dog, who can't go into the garage until the fluid is completely cleaned up. And it's Saturday. Everything is closed until Monday.
My bowl today is filled with joy. Seeing Deborah and the lovely bowl piece she made for Lent. I want to make a bowl.
Today it rained. And it was cold. And we had to help people carve pumpkins. And a guy actually thought there was going to be a LECTURE on how to carve a pumpkin. And he walked out when he was told we were ACTUALLY CARVING REAL PUMPKINS and not just talking about carving pumpkins. And N (my co carver) was forced to come get me at one point, because if she had to spend another minute alone with the three women carving pumpkins, she was going to stab herself with the pumpkin carving tool. Women. We though we were doing this for CHILDREN! Finally, after lunch, some children arrived. An 8 year old showed us his "signature" uni-brow pumpkin design.
I left work at 2:30 to meet Deborah (of the blog in the sidebar) while she is visiting Maine. Great visit. And I got to see all her 12 by 12 pieces in person and her daily Lent pieces. I, of course, had forgotten to bring my pieces. I was just so excited to see her, I forgot everything else.
Got home at the same time as G and noticed a funny smell in the garage. The newly repaired Jeep had leaked ALL it's transmission fluid onto the garage floor. If we had been driving it, we would have ruined the transmission. And we have a dog, who can't go into the garage until the fluid is completely cleaned up. And it's Saturday. Everything is closed until Monday.
My bowl today is filled with joy. Seeing Deborah and the lovely bowl piece she made for Lent. I want to make a bowl.
Friday, October 23, 2009
A Better Day
Sunshine! Yesterday was miserable, dark, cold and wet. Tomorrow promises be be very nasty. So I will revel in the sun today and be content.
The Jeep is still not completely repaired. As they rewire, more things are found to be fried. More parts are needed. The Jeep must have been sitting in the garage, sending current to things and burning up the connections. Quietly. All on it's own. Until the battery died.
I made applesauce and sweet potato veggie burgers yesterday. I made roasted butternut squash on Tuesday. I have chard from the garden, washed, and chopped and ready to saute. I have a gallon sized bag filled with carrots from my garden. The fridge is STUFFED with food. Leftover pizza (G's), pasta and even some pork and baked potatoes from yesterday. I just wish we were eating this stuff. This happens every once in a while, too much food and no interest in eating any of it. I could make a Bean and Escarole Soup with the chard (in place of the escarole). The chard is bitter. I like soup.
I took the dog to daycare yesterday and stayed in the house doing nothing. Well, I did do some beading on Eyedentity and Passion Flower. I now wish I hadn't backed the pieces. I hate when the stitches show on the back. Watched cooking shows. Started reading a book on Georgia O'Keeffe. Later I watched Survivor, Mad Men and forgotten and stitched five squares and circles. Ate Pistachios.
I was doing some "mental math" before falling asleep. Trying to decide how many little squares with circles I need to make a full size quilt. Or an 60, 75 or 90 inch square. I never use what I make on a bed. I like to hang them as art. So I'm more interested in the hanging shape and size, than the bed it will cover. G suggested I count what I have made. I know it's not enough to make anything but it's always good to countdown to a goal. I have 99. More than I thought. Eleven 15 inch square blocks. If I make a 60 inch square, I have almost three rows. For the 75 inch, I have two rows. And, of course, I have made blocks I don't like. There are always blocks we make for a scrappy quilt that just "stick out" and call attention to themselves. Like the Sesame Street song "which of these things doesn't belong here". If we make enough of these misfit blocks, then it all works. Make a few? Not so much.
Tomorrow I will be carving pumpkins at work with small children. And meeting Deborah for coffee and a conversation later in the afternoon. Disgusting and delightful. We have decided to de-gut the pumpkins before the children arrive. And to serve lots of candy. OMG!
I am now getting dressed and taking Riley for a walk and then driving him to daycare and myself to work. I hope this is the last day I work the afternoon shift--or, at least, the last day I work until 6 or 6:30. Yes, I know I could just leave the dog here, by himself. But he chews his bedding when left alone without enough exercise. And dog beds are expensive to replace.
My bowl today is filled with "too much". I will work toward "just enough".
The Jeep is still not completely repaired. As they rewire, more things are found to be fried. More parts are needed. The Jeep must have been sitting in the garage, sending current to things and burning up the connections. Quietly. All on it's own. Until the battery died.
I made applesauce and sweet potato veggie burgers yesterday. I made roasted butternut squash on Tuesday. I have chard from the garden, washed, and chopped and ready to saute. I have a gallon sized bag filled with carrots from my garden. The fridge is STUFFED with food. Leftover pizza (G's), pasta and even some pork and baked potatoes from yesterday. I just wish we were eating this stuff. This happens every once in a while, too much food and no interest in eating any of it. I could make a Bean and Escarole Soup with the chard (in place of the escarole). The chard is bitter. I like soup.
I took the dog to daycare yesterday and stayed in the house doing nothing. Well, I did do some beading on Eyedentity and Passion Flower. I now wish I hadn't backed the pieces. I hate when the stitches show on the back. Watched cooking shows. Started reading a book on Georgia O'Keeffe. Later I watched Survivor, Mad Men and forgotten and stitched five squares and circles. Ate Pistachios.
I was doing some "mental math" before falling asleep. Trying to decide how many little squares with circles I need to make a full size quilt. Or an 60, 75 or 90 inch square. I never use what I make on a bed. I like to hang them as art. So I'm more interested in the hanging shape and size, than the bed it will cover. G suggested I count what I have made. I know it's not enough to make anything but it's always good to countdown to a goal. I have 99. More than I thought. Eleven 15 inch square blocks. If I make a 60 inch square, I have almost three rows. For the 75 inch, I have two rows. And, of course, I have made blocks I don't like. There are always blocks we make for a scrappy quilt that just "stick out" and call attention to themselves. Like the Sesame Street song "which of these things doesn't belong here". If we make enough of these misfit blocks, then it all works. Make a few? Not so much.
Tomorrow I will be carving pumpkins at work with small children. And meeting Deborah for coffee and a conversation later in the afternoon. Disgusting and delightful. We have decided to de-gut the pumpkins before the children arrive. And to serve lots of candy. OMG!
I am now getting dressed and taking Riley for a walk and then driving him to daycare and myself to work. I hope this is the last day I work the afternoon shift--or, at least, the last day I work until 6 or 6:30. Yes, I know I could just leave the dog here, by himself. But he chews his bedding when left alone without enough exercise. And dog beds are expensive to replace.
My bowl today is filled with "too much". I will work toward "just enough".
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Table View
I think this could be an interesting photo op. The view of the table on a certain day and time everyweek. No fussing. Like I did for this shot. I moved a bunch of stuff to make it look more "arty".
The dog woke me up at around 7:30, barking. He stopped and I went back to sleep. But when I finally got up an hour later, I decided he was going to day care. It's raining (sort of) and I have the house lights on because it's dismal. While I was out delivering the dog to daycare, I stopped at the grocery to return a product with too much fragrance and purchase milk. My path toward the back of the store (and the milk) was the cereal aisle. My shredded wheat (store brand) was $1.89 all spring and summer. Then last week it was $2.09. Today it was $2.29. I won't be buying it anymore. I meant to check on the frozen orange juice I buy. It also, is magically increasing in price every week. My large container of oatmeal went up 20 cents.
I didn't get to make any squares and circles last night while watching television. I didn't get to actually "watch" television as my eyes were dry and irritated. So I put drops in and covered my eyes with a cool damp towel. And listened to our shows. And waited for my eyes to return to normal, which took a long time. My eye doctor doesn't want me rubbing my eyes. And rubbing makes them feel ever so much better.
G had taken the Jeep in for service yesterday. The battery had lost it's charge, the brake lights didn't work, it needed an oil change and rotation of the tires, new spark plugs and fluids etc. It also needed to have the electrical wiring replaced, I guess. They are still working on it and the tab is over $1000 already. Now, my husband can see the problems we'll be having owning four vehicles. Two of which, the Jeep and BMW, are not being driven. But the Jeep will be returning to service now that winter is coming. To justify the money we are spending on it.
Do I sound whiny? In that pretentious, yuppie way? I own four cars, and it's such a pain, boo hoo. I hate when I sound like that.
I'm going to do some housework and then watch a DVD while sewing circles to squares. I am really missing my West Wing episodes. They'll be back on starting Monday but I have to face the fact that there are only a week's worth of episodes left. Then what will I do???? How will I entertain myself? This season's new programing (and the old programing) isn't really very good. Even House is boring.
And my nose is running.
My bowl today is full of self serving whining.
The dog woke me up at around 7:30, barking. He stopped and I went back to sleep. But when I finally got up an hour later, I decided he was going to day care. It's raining (sort of) and I have the house lights on because it's dismal. While I was out delivering the dog to daycare, I stopped at the grocery to return a product with too much fragrance and purchase milk. My path toward the back of the store (and the milk) was the cereal aisle. My shredded wheat (store brand) was $1.89 all spring and summer. Then last week it was $2.09. Today it was $2.29. I won't be buying it anymore. I meant to check on the frozen orange juice I buy. It also, is magically increasing in price every week. My large container of oatmeal went up 20 cents.
I didn't get to make any squares and circles last night while watching television. I didn't get to actually "watch" television as my eyes were dry and irritated. So I put drops in and covered my eyes with a cool damp towel. And listened to our shows. And waited for my eyes to return to normal, which took a long time. My eye doctor doesn't want me rubbing my eyes. And rubbing makes them feel ever so much better.
G had taken the Jeep in for service yesterday. The battery had lost it's charge, the brake lights didn't work, it needed an oil change and rotation of the tires, new spark plugs and fluids etc. It also needed to have the electrical wiring replaced, I guess. They are still working on it and the tab is over $1000 already. Now, my husband can see the problems we'll be having owning four vehicles. Two of which, the Jeep and BMW, are not being driven. But the Jeep will be returning to service now that winter is coming. To justify the money we are spending on it.
Do I sound whiny? In that pretentious, yuppie way? I own four cars, and it's such a pain, boo hoo. I hate when I sound like that.
I'm going to do some housework and then watch a DVD while sewing circles to squares. I am really missing my West Wing episodes. They'll be back on starting Monday but I have to face the fact that there are only a week's worth of episodes left. Then what will I do???? How will I entertain myself? This season's new programing (and the old programing) isn't really very good. Even House is boring.
And my nose is running.
My bowl today is full of self serving whining.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
So NOT My Table
But it is the table I wish I had. Empty. Ready for anything. And nice chairs. I got this Swedish decorating book at the library yesterday and discovered these long tables, like mine, but scooted up again a wall and bench so the room has some "space" to walk. My table sits in the center of my space and makes the one side an aisle and the other not much better for walking through. I was going for symmetry. The Swedes have been decorating this way for a long time--it must be the most functional use of space. And, really, how often is the table actually in use? Once mine is filled with crap, it isn't usable at all. Unless we shove the piles together.
I remember when I always had a clean table. Not so long ago. Well, maybe ten years. any project could just be laid out and cut. No clearing or pushing of piles. Any newspaper could be laid out flat for reading. Placemats and dinner plates could be arranged in seconds. My occasional vases of flowers were hard to miss.
Right now I have a vase of "past their prime" pink roses on the table and we can hardly see them. In fact, I only just now remembered them. They could have been at the top of this post.
I just wrote, read and deleted a whole, long paragraph on winter cars.
I finished 10 squares with circles last night while watching television. And added them to my pile. Once I got going it wasn't too bad. I have trouble getting started.
I had intended to begin my food diary yesterday, but things got out of hand and I ate too much. Not bad things. No cake or cookies or fried things. I will try and do better today.
I'm going to get dressed and go pick G up at the Jeep place and bring him home. We may do a few more garden posts, take the dog for a walk and I'll see if I can get the Heuchera in the ground today. I have food to cook for dinner, but G may want o eat out on his day off. We'll see. Riley is chewing his dog bed. Wants to be at daycare.
My bowl today is filled with intention. I want it to be filled with determination. But that is illusive today. It could also be filled with resolve. Intention is better than remaining empty.
I intend to push the table to the wall. :-)
I remember when I always had a clean table. Not so long ago. Well, maybe ten years. any project could just be laid out and cut. No clearing or pushing of piles. Any newspaper could be laid out flat for reading. Placemats and dinner plates could be arranged in seconds. My occasional vases of flowers were hard to miss.
Right now I have a vase of "past their prime" pink roses on the table and we can hardly see them. In fact, I only just now remembered them. They could have been at the top of this post.
I just wrote, read and deleted a whole, long paragraph on winter cars.
I finished 10 squares with circles last night while watching television. And added them to my pile. Once I got going it wasn't too bad. I have trouble getting started.
I had intended to begin my food diary yesterday, but things got out of hand and I ate too much. Not bad things. No cake or cookies or fried things. I will try and do better today.
I'm going to get dressed and go pick G up at the Jeep place and bring him home. We may do a few more garden posts, take the dog for a walk and I'll see if I can get the Heuchera in the ground today. I have food to cook for dinner, but G may want o eat out on his day off. We'll see. Riley is chewing his dog bed. Wants to be at daycare.
My bowl today is filled with intention. I want it to be filled with determination. But that is illusive today. It could also be filled with resolve. Intention is better than remaining empty.
I intend to push the table to the wall. :-)
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Squares and Circles
My pile of finished squares is growing slowly. Only four yesterday. Seven the day before. I ironed, cut and assembled more freezer paper circles yesterday before work. It felt good to have a project to work on. I even added four new fabrics to the mix. A new blue with dots, a new yellow with red dots, a new French green and a new "sparkle" fabric, those mysterious combos of light, medium and darks tones that just spark a quilt. Now I have to deal with the lack of small pieces to make more circles. I'm guessing some of the squares will be called into service as circles. And some squares, in colors I am no longer that fond of, will be shoved aside.
My friend P just called, she purchased two upholstered chairs for $50 and now wants to return the two chairs I loaned her years ago. She wanted to store them in her cellar. No. After years with her two dogs sleeping on them, the chairs are dirty and stained. Do I really want them back? I had imagined removing the legs and adding taller ones, reupholstering and using the new chairs in the dining room. The master and mistress chairs. They are very low to the ground right now and the seat backs and arms are also low. That was the style when I bought them in 1981. This is why P bought new chairs. So they would have a higher back and be more cozy. Her handy guy could always take them to the dump and we'd be done with them. Since I am actually trying to get rid of stuff. Right?
Riley and I are getting off to a slow start this morning. G took the dog for a run in the woods yesterday evening after work and daycare. The dog was very sleepy yesterday evening and he still seems tired this morning. Plus it's cloudy. The temps are going as high as 58 today. Winter is at bay, for a few days.
I spoke to my employer yesterday and told him the 12 to 6 shift wasn't working for me as it was making a mess of my husband's work schedule. G was having to go in late and get out early to get Riley to daycare and pick him up on the days I work. Because I couldn't. The daycare locks up at 6 on the dot. I get out of work at some point after 6 depending on late arriving customers. We don't ask them to leave at closing.
So my employer walked around asking other employees if they could switch shifts with me. He needs people for closing. I mentioned I could work until 5 but that wasn't what he wants. The 12 to 6 shift is boring. After 4 we stand around doing not much of anything. I swept the big greenhouse floor and sprayed the 3 and 4 inch foliage plants with stinky insecticide yesterday. And then I walked around outside to remove the stink from my own self.
I work again on Friday. My friend P says we should just leave the dog at home alone all day when we work to solve this problem. P says dogs stay home alone for hours and hours just fine. Her dogs are WILD when she gets home from work, tired after a long day. And she has to take them out and run them, even though she would rather not. My dog is calm and tired after a day at daycare. And asleep by 7 pm.
We are raising our dog in a way that's best for us. A neighbor walked by last night with his Golden. Riley was up the driveway from G. Sitting. Waiting for G to come back across the Invisible Fence line. The neighbor saw Riley. Asked why he was sitting. Asked why he wasn't barking at people going by (like his dog does). Why he wasn't racing back and forth along the electric fence line (like his dog does). G said that that was just how Riley rolls. And also because Riley isn't left alone all day, running the yard, sleeping in the garage and trying to get attention from passing strangers by barking.
G and Riley have met some dogs on their walks on the Town Commons. Dogs that are good playmates for Riley. Milo and Spice. Riley ran with Milo yesterday evening. Milo was ready for a nap afterward. Spice gives Riley a good run and he gives up before she does.
I plan on going to the grocery later to get something to cook. I have decided to only buy the major storage/pantry items on the big weekly shop and then shop for what I want to cook as I want to cook it. Then I won't have food going bad in the fridge or freezer. The pork with baked potatoes, green beans and fresh applesauce was so good, I want to make it again. And I have a recipe for an Apple Bundt cake which sounds like something G will like with coffee in the evening. Heavy and Sweet.
I'm going to start my daily food diary again. I have admitted to myself I am a Food Addict. And I need to control what I eat. And I can, realistically, only have 1200 calories a day right now. I have to start saying "NO" again. In order to fit into my clothes. Baby has way too much back, right now.
My bowl today is filled with choices.
My friend P just called, she purchased two upholstered chairs for $50 and now wants to return the two chairs I loaned her years ago. She wanted to store them in her cellar. No. After years with her two dogs sleeping on them, the chairs are dirty and stained. Do I really want them back? I had imagined removing the legs and adding taller ones, reupholstering and using the new chairs in the dining room. The master and mistress chairs. They are very low to the ground right now and the seat backs and arms are also low. That was the style when I bought them in 1981. This is why P bought new chairs. So they would have a higher back and be more cozy. Her handy guy could always take them to the dump and we'd be done with them. Since I am actually trying to get rid of stuff. Right?
Riley and I are getting off to a slow start this morning. G took the dog for a run in the woods yesterday evening after work and daycare. The dog was very sleepy yesterday evening and he still seems tired this morning. Plus it's cloudy. The temps are going as high as 58 today. Winter is at bay, for a few days.
I spoke to my employer yesterday and told him the 12 to 6 shift wasn't working for me as it was making a mess of my husband's work schedule. G was having to go in late and get out early to get Riley to daycare and pick him up on the days I work. Because I couldn't. The daycare locks up at 6 on the dot. I get out of work at some point after 6 depending on late arriving customers. We don't ask them to leave at closing.
So my employer walked around asking other employees if they could switch shifts with me. He needs people for closing. I mentioned I could work until 5 but that wasn't what he wants. The 12 to 6 shift is boring. After 4 we stand around doing not much of anything. I swept the big greenhouse floor and sprayed the 3 and 4 inch foliage plants with stinky insecticide yesterday. And then I walked around outside to remove the stink from my own self.
I work again on Friday. My friend P says we should just leave the dog at home alone all day when we work to solve this problem. P says dogs stay home alone for hours and hours just fine. Her dogs are WILD when she gets home from work, tired after a long day. And she has to take them out and run them, even though she would rather not. My dog is calm and tired after a day at daycare. And asleep by 7 pm.
We are raising our dog in a way that's best for us. A neighbor walked by last night with his Golden. Riley was up the driveway from G. Sitting. Waiting for G to come back across the Invisible Fence line. The neighbor saw Riley. Asked why he was sitting. Asked why he wasn't barking at people going by (like his dog does). Why he wasn't racing back and forth along the electric fence line (like his dog does). G said that that was just how Riley rolls. And also because Riley isn't left alone all day, running the yard, sleeping in the garage and trying to get attention from passing strangers by barking.
G and Riley have met some dogs on their walks on the Town Commons. Dogs that are good playmates for Riley. Milo and Spice. Riley ran with Milo yesterday evening. Milo was ready for a nap afterward. Spice gives Riley a good run and he gives up before she does.
I plan on going to the grocery later to get something to cook. I have decided to only buy the major storage/pantry items on the big weekly shop and then shop for what I want to cook as I want to cook it. Then I won't have food going bad in the fridge or freezer. The pork with baked potatoes, green beans and fresh applesauce was so good, I want to make it again. And I have a recipe for an Apple Bundt cake which sounds like something G will like with coffee in the evening. Heavy and Sweet.
I'm going to start my daily food diary again. I have admitted to myself I am a Food Addict. And I need to control what I eat. And I can, realistically, only have 1200 calories a day right now. I have to start saying "NO" again. In order to fit into my clothes. Baby has way too much back, right now.
My bowl today is filled with choices.
Monday, October 19, 2009
And You Thought It Was Snowing
We watched the Patriots game yesterday (Boston) and couldn't believe it was warmer and drier here in Maine! They had snow and ice. We had a bit of rain. As you can see, from the picture I just took of my backyard this morning, we are still enjoying autumn. The leaves haven't even fallen yet. It's probably in the mid to high 30's right now but with some sunshine we may get up into the low 50's. Or Not.
I stayed in my jammies ALL day yesterday. I got the table done, the laundry done and the shirts ironed. And I didn't cook any dinner. I did work on my circles and appliqued seven. It takes me 20 minutes to stitch each circle. Tiny stitches. I stopped at seven because I had no more circles and squares prepped. That's what I will be doing as soon as I finish here.
G asked me why I was making them. He doesn't find them attractive. They may not be but it's something to do while watching television. Instead of snacking. And the finished quilt could look decent. One never knows. I've made beautiful blocks with lovely fabrics, and when sewn together, the result was blah! And a simple, nothing special fabric and pattern, when sewn together, is stunning. That's the way it is with quilting.
The fabrics I am using for my circles and squares all have a vaguely French Provencal feel. That's their only relationship, other than the French color palette of brick red, Tuscan gold, a mellow yellow green and a French blue. A scrap quilt. I started this project when I was "all a flutter" over all things French. Still am. But not as enthusiastic. Making over a hundred (200) of the same thing is not so much fun. And I still have the tedious work of sewing them all together. And the layout of the squares. Blech! This time I may sew them together into squares and not long strips. I hate sewing long strips. I ALWAYS get one strip upside down and it ruins all my placement work. No matter how many times I check and recheck.
Which reminds me. I have a king size Yellow Brick Road that needs it's binding sewn on in order to be "finished". If I finish it I can put it on the bed in the summer of 2010. I don't even remember how long ago I made it? Some of those lemon, lime, cherry and orange blocks had to be hand colored with dye pens in order to "get along" after they were pieced. OMG!
I have to be ready to leave for work in 2 hours. No West Wing to watch. Bravo is showing James Bond all week. Must be school vacation or something. I have last winter's wardrobe to try on (to see if they still fit), the freezer paper circles to iron onto fabric. G left me the truck so I plan on taking a few garbage bags along to work, to put in the dumpster.
I had time to think yesterday. I was angry at work on Friday. Most everyone else was scheduled for more days/hours than I was for the coming week. I am competitive. I want what everyone else has. So I was angry. Grumpy. Frustrated. And after much thrashing about (mentally) this weekend, I realized I don't even like this job anymore. Why would I, honestly, want to be there more days and hours???? It's my only social outlet. My only reason to get dressed and go out the door, except for the dog and his walk. Riley finds my conversation gets in the way of a good nap, so I have given up trying to talk to him. So if I stay home too much, I will be lonely.
My bowl today is empty. And the Buddhist monks say that is a good thing. It will make me more accepting when my bowl has something in it.
I stayed in my jammies ALL day yesterday. I got the table done, the laundry done and the shirts ironed. And I didn't cook any dinner. I did work on my circles and appliqued seven. It takes me 20 minutes to stitch each circle. Tiny stitches. I stopped at seven because I had no more circles and squares prepped. That's what I will be doing as soon as I finish here.
G asked me why I was making them. He doesn't find them attractive. They may not be but it's something to do while watching television. Instead of snacking. And the finished quilt could look decent. One never knows. I've made beautiful blocks with lovely fabrics, and when sewn together, the result was blah! And a simple, nothing special fabric and pattern, when sewn together, is stunning. That's the way it is with quilting.
The fabrics I am using for my circles and squares all have a vaguely French Provencal feel. That's their only relationship, other than the French color palette of brick red, Tuscan gold, a mellow yellow green and a French blue. A scrap quilt. I started this project when I was "all a flutter" over all things French. Still am. But not as enthusiastic. Making over a hundred (200) of the same thing is not so much fun. And I still have the tedious work of sewing them all together. And the layout of the squares. Blech! This time I may sew them together into squares and not long strips. I hate sewing long strips. I ALWAYS get one strip upside down and it ruins all my placement work. No matter how many times I check and recheck.
Which reminds me. I have a king size Yellow Brick Road that needs it's binding sewn on in order to be "finished". If I finish it I can put it on the bed in the summer of 2010. I don't even remember how long ago I made it? Some of those lemon, lime, cherry and orange blocks had to be hand colored with dye pens in order to "get along" after they were pieced. OMG!
I have to be ready to leave for work in 2 hours. No West Wing to watch. Bravo is showing James Bond all week. Must be school vacation or something. I have last winter's wardrobe to try on (to see if they still fit), the freezer paper circles to iron onto fabric. G left me the truck so I plan on taking a few garbage bags along to work, to put in the dumpster.
I had time to think yesterday. I was angry at work on Friday. Most everyone else was scheduled for more days/hours than I was for the coming week. I am competitive. I want what everyone else has. So I was angry. Grumpy. Frustrated. And after much thrashing about (mentally) this weekend, I realized I don't even like this job anymore. Why would I, honestly, want to be there more days and hours???? It's my only social outlet. My only reason to get dressed and go out the door, except for the dog and his walk. Riley finds my conversation gets in the way of a good nap, so I have given up trying to talk to him. So if I stay home too much, I will be lonely.
My bowl today is empty. And the Buddhist monks say that is a good thing. It will make me more accepting when my bowl has something in it.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Blueberry Pancakes
Yesterday was a hard working day here at my house. So we started the morning a bit later (9:30) and had blueberry pancakes for breakfast. Still no bacon. And coffee. I'm on my third cup but no worries-- it's decaf. The Blueberry Pancakes might be the highpoint of today's agenda.
G has already walked the dog and is now removing more fencing wire from the garden area. The original posts have rotted out below ground and one or two have fallen into the garden dragging the fencing in over the compost bins and some of the raspberry canes. Yesterday G dug four out and replaced them with new posts. What G wants to do today is NAP, but before he can do that he has to work outside on either removing the wire fencing, digging out rotten poles or something. He cannot spend every day off sleeping.
Today I am clearing off the dining room table. UGH! That means taking the piles of stuff to "other places" which I will need to reorganize to find a spot to put the new stuff. I have collage materials. Paid bills. Unpaid bills. Quilting supplies I took to Atlanta. Birthday cards. Cake pans. Dog Toys that need repairs. Journals plus pens and glue sticks. Vegetable and flower seed packets. And G found a large box of garbage bags for me to fill with stuff.
When I cannot STAND "clearing off the dining room table" one second more; I have a third load of wash to start, dog towels to wash and dry, carpets to vacuum, shirts to iron and supper to think about. And I could try and fit in -- changing out of my jammies, brushing my teeth, combing my hair. Will I be napping? Didn't think so.
I still have more outdoor work of my own to do. Heuchera to plant. More perennials to cut back. More ajuga to dig out. I emptied the deck planter boxes of plants (planted) and dirt for winter storage and unpotted my Amaryllis bulbs for potting later in the winter. I have my orchids to take upstairs and the Clivia to water. I want to make a more secure platform for my large potted plants--the Clivia fell over during the summer. Perhaps G will help carry one of the inside doors we picked up free at someone's curb last summer, upstairs. I though the doors would make great work tables. Like for painting fabric and dyeing things. Even for monoprinting. Messy things. Unfortunately, we had the room upstairs carpeted. So messy things aren't a good idea anymore. Not up there. Where my studio is supposed to be.
I'm fidgety. I had to look that up in order to spell it correctly.
I want to do something that is FUN!
Folding laundry and cleaning up piles of junk is not FUN! I went away on vacation to get away from all this and now I'm back and it's all still here. CRAP. CRAP. CRAP.
Okay. I'm going to brush my teeth, fold the pile of laundry and sheets, get dressed (maybe), make the bed, and do a few things on the table. Iron shirts. Do a few more piles. Maybe even shred some junk mail. Fill a box with books to donate. Organize the bills. Think about a late lunch/early dinner. Mystery Masterpiece tonight and also Mad Men.
While I clear off the table I will envision Thanksgiving Dinner or even Company Dinner, flickering candles, silver flatware, good wine. And a really good, dark stain on the raw wood with a nice wax finish. And I may even think about a nice set of 10 new chairs around the table. Pottery Barn. Get in touch with my Yuppie Roots. I've missed spending money during the austere years around here.
My bowl today is filled with fidgety fantasy.
G has already walked the dog and is now removing more fencing wire from the garden area. The original posts have rotted out below ground and one or two have fallen into the garden dragging the fencing in over the compost bins and some of the raspberry canes. Yesterday G dug four out and replaced them with new posts. What G wants to do today is NAP, but before he can do that he has to work outside on either removing the wire fencing, digging out rotten poles or something. He cannot spend every day off sleeping.
Today I am clearing off the dining room table. UGH! That means taking the piles of stuff to "other places" which I will need to reorganize to find a spot to put the new stuff. I have collage materials. Paid bills. Unpaid bills. Quilting supplies I took to Atlanta. Birthday cards. Cake pans. Dog Toys that need repairs. Journals plus pens and glue sticks. Vegetable and flower seed packets. And G found a large box of garbage bags for me to fill with stuff.
When I cannot STAND "clearing off the dining room table" one second more; I have a third load of wash to start, dog towels to wash and dry, carpets to vacuum, shirts to iron and supper to think about. And I could try and fit in -- changing out of my jammies, brushing my teeth, combing my hair. Will I be napping? Didn't think so.
I still have more outdoor work of my own to do. Heuchera to plant. More perennials to cut back. More ajuga to dig out. I emptied the deck planter boxes of plants (planted) and dirt for winter storage and unpotted my Amaryllis bulbs for potting later in the winter. I have my orchids to take upstairs and the Clivia to water. I want to make a more secure platform for my large potted plants--the Clivia fell over during the summer. Perhaps G will help carry one of the inside doors we picked up free at someone's curb last summer, upstairs. I though the doors would make great work tables. Like for painting fabric and dyeing things. Even for monoprinting. Messy things. Unfortunately, we had the room upstairs carpeted. So messy things aren't a good idea anymore. Not up there. Where my studio is supposed to be.
I'm fidgety. I had to look that up in order to spell it correctly.
I want to do something that is FUN!
Folding laundry and cleaning up piles of junk is not FUN! I went away on vacation to get away from all this and now I'm back and it's all still here. CRAP. CRAP. CRAP.
Okay. I'm going to brush my teeth, fold the pile of laundry and sheets, get dressed (maybe), make the bed, and do a few things on the table. Iron shirts. Do a few more piles. Maybe even shred some junk mail. Fill a box with books to donate. Organize the bills. Think about a late lunch/early dinner. Mystery Masterpiece tonight and also Mad Men.
While I clear off the table I will envision Thanksgiving Dinner or even Company Dinner, flickering candles, silver flatware, good wine. And a really good, dark stain on the raw wood with a nice wax finish. And I may even think about a nice set of 10 new chairs around the table. Pottery Barn. Get in touch with my Yuppie Roots. I've missed spending money during the austere years around here.
My bowl today is filled with fidgety fantasy.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
My "Lack of Focus" Studio
Surreal. Fuzzy. Blurred. Messy. Unorganized. Ridiculous. Any and all would apply here. I go in there to find something: scissors, and it becomes so damned frustrating. The room is as big as it looks. No space to even re-pile things. And even if I did take away the collage elements--where would I take them away TO? I have painting things, I have quilting things, I have used clothing to be used in fabric collage, I have a closet of commercial fabric, I have projects in lidded tubs, stacked along the walls. I have rolls and rolls of batting given to me by I don't even remember who.
No wonder I try to avoid that room.
I think it's the family disease. Saving things. In case we might need them. Not being able to part with something that may have a use someday, not now, but someday. My dad had 6 cubic yards of it saved in his house. I know. I bagged it all. And paid the dumpster charges.
The yardage was selected, purchased and lovingly folded, sorted by color, and stored in the fabric closet on shelving installed specifically for it. Lovely to look at. I did use it when I belonged to a quilting group. For the odd "block of the month" or charity quilt. And I freely offered it to many beginning quilters, for their first projects. But my wild taste in fabric and color wasn't all that popular here in Maine. Still isn't. Freddie Moran.
The really FUNNY thing is that I PREFER the Shaker look. Spare and simple. Function over style. Bare floors. Just a table and chairs. No fluff. And I live with OVERLOAD. Ten pillows on the slipcovered sofas. Each. Piles of books. Too many houseplants which I forget to water because I put them upstairs where the light is better and never go up there. "UP THERE" is where my studio used to be. Until my knees started to go arthritic.
Today's bowl is filled with frustration.
No wonder I try to avoid that room.
I think it's the family disease. Saving things. In case we might need them. Not being able to part with something that may have a use someday, not now, but someday. My dad had 6 cubic yards of it saved in his house. I know. I bagged it all. And paid the dumpster charges.
The yardage was selected, purchased and lovingly folded, sorted by color, and stored in the fabric closet on shelving installed specifically for it. Lovely to look at. I did use it when I belonged to a quilting group. For the odd "block of the month" or charity quilt. And I freely offered it to many beginning quilters, for their first projects. But my wild taste in fabric and color wasn't all that popular here in Maine. Still isn't. Freddie Moran.
The really FUNNY thing is that I PREFER the Shaker look. Spare and simple. Function over style. Bare floors. Just a table and chairs. No fluff. And I live with OVERLOAD. Ten pillows on the slipcovered sofas. Each. Piles of books. Too many houseplants which I forget to water because I put them upstairs where the light is better and never go up there. "UP THERE" is where my studio used to be. Until my knees started to go arthritic.
Today's bowl is filled with frustration.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Friend of Twelve by Twelve-In Progress
Identity. Now that I see this "in print" I can see that I have some work to do on the mouth. In person it reads much better as lips. The title of this would be "EYE dentity" and I wanted to emphasize the eye in my self portrait. Because it is my view, my way of seeing things that defines my identity. As a person and as an artist.
Passion. I, too, chose to do the Passion Flower. This is a close up of the block and I may crop it to a 10 inch square in order to condense the image and not have so much white space around the flower (which you can't see here, as this is tightly cropped). I understand that if we are limited to 12 inches square we should use the space wisely. I can always go back in with dyes and darken the background. I love the stitching. I haven't beaded this yet. And perhaps it will have more spokes. I'm not sure they can be correctly called petals.
I don't have a clue as to what to make for Twelve, the final image. But I do want to finish.
Events in my life "happened" at just the wrong time each of these months. I confess that my pieces were made in the week before each reveal. I did think about the subject in the 2 months we had to do the work but never actually did the work till the last possible minute. That worked for 9 of the pieces.
600. On another topic. This is my 600th blog post. I think I may have been blogging for four years now. How did that happen? The time passes so quickly these days. And, truly, I don't know how I would have gotten through this past year without you dear, dear, readers. (and the year before that)
Your comments. Well, I don't think I can express, in words, what it does to my heart to see a comment pop up in my email box. I try and reply to each comment that includes a return address.
My blog has also fostered a deeper connection with my children who are getting to know who I am when I'm not their "mom". This is especially true with my son out in California.
I may wish for hundreds and thousands of readers, but I'm sure it wouldn't be the same as having my little band of 30. Loyal, longtime readers. And the occasional surprise of a "lurker" who comes forward to say hello. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!
You are the reason I get up in the morning (to check my emails and read your blogs). You are my connection to the world. You know me better than anyone. I tell no lies and keep few secrets. And I am on my best behaviour with you. Trying not to be petty (often), not talking about people behind their backs, and trying not to manipulate you emotionally. Because there are bloggers out there who do those things. And their blogs are popular. And you know I would love being "popular". :-0
My bowl today is filled with gratitude and humility. And joy. And tears. And laughter. All the stuff you and I have shared. And will share in the coming year. Each year, at blog-o-versary time, I make a promise to myself to "do better". To make the blog more interesting, more fun, more honest and in doing that, make MYSELF more interesting, fun, honest.
Passion. I, too, chose to do the Passion Flower. This is a close up of the block and I may crop it to a 10 inch square in order to condense the image and not have so much white space around the flower (which you can't see here, as this is tightly cropped). I understand that if we are limited to 12 inches square we should use the space wisely. I can always go back in with dyes and darken the background. I love the stitching. I haven't beaded this yet. And perhaps it will have more spokes. I'm not sure they can be correctly called petals.
I don't have a clue as to what to make for Twelve, the final image. But I do want to finish.
Events in my life "happened" at just the wrong time each of these months. I confess that my pieces were made in the week before each reveal. I did think about the subject in the 2 months we had to do the work but never actually did the work till the last possible minute. That worked for 9 of the pieces.
600. On another topic. This is my 600th blog post. I think I may have been blogging for four years now. How did that happen? The time passes so quickly these days. And, truly, I don't know how I would have gotten through this past year without you dear, dear, readers. (and the year before that)
Your comments. Well, I don't think I can express, in words, what it does to my heart to see a comment pop up in my email box. I try and reply to each comment that includes a return address.
My blog has also fostered a deeper connection with my children who are getting to know who I am when I'm not their "mom". This is especially true with my son out in California.
I may wish for hundreds and thousands of readers, but I'm sure it wouldn't be the same as having my little band of 30. Loyal, longtime readers. And the occasional surprise of a "lurker" who comes forward to say hello. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!
You are the reason I get up in the morning (to check my emails and read your blogs). You are my connection to the world. You know me better than anyone. I tell no lies and keep few secrets. And I am on my best behaviour with you. Trying not to be petty (often), not talking about people behind their backs, and trying not to manipulate you emotionally. Because there are bloggers out there who do those things. And their blogs are popular. And you know I would love being "popular". :-0
My bowl today is filled with gratitude and humility. And joy. And tears. And laughter. All the stuff you and I have shared. And will share in the coming year. Each year, at blog-o-versary time, I make a promise to myself to "do better". To make the blog more interesting, more fun, more honest and in doing that, make MYSELF more interesting, fun, honest.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Riley's Toy Basket
Riley is still napping this morning. I woke up a bit earlier than I wanted because a neighbor called to ask me to pick up the mail and papers while she visits her daughter in New York. I expect that Riley and I will be walking later, playing with toys and going for a ride in the car to pay the real estate taxes that are due today.
It's cold. We had an overnight freeze. I have the heat turned on even though I try to see how long I can put off turning on the heating zones each winter. And, yes, it is winter. Maine has only two seasons. Winter. Not Winter.
Yesterday I scored a hooded company logo sweatshirt. After getting the sweatshirt I was sent out into the freezing cold (not really but almost) perennial yard to cut back the remaining perennials for hours and hours. Remember I did this on Monday when the temps were nice and the sun was shining, warmly. Let me tell you, this was bone chilling. I would take a break every hour to go into the annual house and have my glasses fog up. I judge the "coldness" of the day by what I need to wear to be warm outdoors. Yesterday: long sleeve shirt, company s/s tee, new sweatshirt, fleece lined company vest, waterproof gloves, wool socks and Crocs. Winter: long sleeve tee, s/s company tee, down hunting liner, fleece lined company vest, wool socks, wool scarf and wool hat, and thinsulate gloves. I take things off if the greenhouse is warm and put clothing back on if I have to go outdoors. We all bring extra clothing in case we get wet. Especially socks. I wear hot pink Crocs year round.
I think I am going to start bringing a large Thermos of hot coffee to work with me. Now that I drink so much GOOD coffee, I find it's warmth and full bodied flavor to be very comforting. All day long.
I mailed K about 9 yards of white with black print fabrics for the Christmas bed quilt she is making. She keeps making blocks until she runs out of fabric. And the quilts keep getting larger and larger. We made up squares of B/W and circles of green while I was visiting and she actually appliqued ALL of the blocks we made. And even 50 of the blue and yellow ones for another bed quilt. I got about a dozen of my own sewn. Slacker that I am. I need to set up a traveling work station and keep track of the needles. Riley is always on the lookout for anything that falls on the floor. And I drop needles like a pine tree.
West Wing will not be airing for 10 days starting Monday. I am in shock. Bravo is going to show MOVIES! The episodes I'm watching are from 2005. Anyone know when the series ended? I got a comment from someone with the boxed set--- let me know how much is left. Jimmy Smits is running for President- 105 days to election day. Please.
We had soup again last night. G's cold has gone into the coughing stage. My walking partner (we haven't walked but three or four times this "not winter" season) has a bad cold which sent her to her bed. I think we'll have pasta tonight. My favorite winter meal of pan sauteed pork, baked potatoes, steamed green beans and applesauce was uber delicious on Tuesday.
Today I have to pay our taxes, return books to the library and pay fines (as my status as a library employee was finally reduced to ordinary citizen) and stop at the grocery to buy more apples. This time I will make a better apple pie and more applesauce. I may even get more green beans. We'll be having pizza on Friday or Saturday. G has the weekend off and plans to repair the rotten garden posts and reattach the fencing. He hasn't even purchased the replacement posts. That alone will take about 2 hours with travel time to the place that carries long poles. And he will sleep late, eat breakfast etc. I can't see much work getting done.
I have bulbs to plant and the new Heuchera that I bought yesterday on sale. Licorice and Cotton Candy. I also have an unidentified peony to plant. In Sam's garden. And I have my own perennial yard to cut back.
My bowl today is filled with the need to be more positive and less pessimistic.
Today would have been my dad's 87th birthday.
It's cold. We had an overnight freeze. I have the heat turned on even though I try to see how long I can put off turning on the heating zones each winter. And, yes, it is winter. Maine has only two seasons. Winter. Not Winter.
Yesterday I scored a hooded company logo sweatshirt. After getting the sweatshirt I was sent out into the freezing cold (not really but almost) perennial yard to cut back the remaining perennials for hours and hours. Remember I did this on Monday when the temps were nice and the sun was shining, warmly. Let me tell you, this was bone chilling. I would take a break every hour to go into the annual house and have my glasses fog up. I judge the "coldness" of the day by what I need to wear to be warm outdoors. Yesterday: long sleeve shirt, company s/s tee, new sweatshirt, fleece lined company vest, waterproof gloves, wool socks and Crocs. Winter: long sleeve tee, s/s company tee, down hunting liner, fleece lined company vest, wool socks, wool scarf and wool hat, and thinsulate gloves. I take things off if the greenhouse is warm and put clothing back on if I have to go outdoors. We all bring extra clothing in case we get wet. Especially socks. I wear hot pink Crocs year round.
I think I am going to start bringing a large Thermos of hot coffee to work with me. Now that I drink so much GOOD coffee, I find it's warmth and full bodied flavor to be very comforting. All day long.
I mailed K about 9 yards of white with black print fabrics for the Christmas bed quilt she is making. She keeps making blocks until she runs out of fabric. And the quilts keep getting larger and larger. We made up squares of B/W and circles of green while I was visiting and she actually appliqued ALL of the blocks we made. And even 50 of the blue and yellow ones for another bed quilt. I got about a dozen of my own sewn. Slacker that I am. I need to set up a traveling work station and keep track of the needles. Riley is always on the lookout for anything that falls on the floor. And I drop needles like a pine tree.
West Wing will not be airing for 10 days starting Monday. I am in shock. Bravo is going to show MOVIES! The episodes I'm watching are from 2005. Anyone know when the series ended? I got a comment from someone with the boxed set--- let me know how much is left. Jimmy Smits is running for President- 105 days to election day. Please.
We had soup again last night. G's cold has gone into the coughing stage. My walking partner (we haven't walked but three or four times this "not winter" season) has a bad cold which sent her to her bed. I think we'll have pasta tonight. My favorite winter meal of pan sauteed pork, baked potatoes, steamed green beans and applesauce was uber delicious on Tuesday.
Today I have to pay our taxes, return books to the library and pay fines (as my status as a library employee was finally reduced to ordinary citizen) and stop at the grocery to buy more apples. This time I will make a better apple pie and more applesauce. I may even get more green beans. We'll be having pizza on Friday or Saturday. G has the weekend off and plans to repair the rotten garden posts and reattach the fencing. He hasn't even purchased the replacement posts. That alone will take about 2 hours with travel time to the place that carries long poles. And he will sleep late, eat breakfast etc. I can't see much work getting done.
I have bulbs to plant and the new Heuchera that I bought yesterday on sale. Licorice and Cotton Candy. I also have an unidentified peony to plant. In Sam's garden. And I have my own perennial yard to cut back.
My bowl today is filled with the need to be more positive and less pessimistic.
Today would have been my dad's 87th birthday.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
It's Raining
I woke up to the sound of rain. (I took this picture of my weeping crab tree just moments ago) Cold rain. Yesterday, at work, it was cold but sunny and the greenhouse crew was busy clipping the perennials short for their return trip to the solar greenhouse in Falmouth. I would have liked a bit of sunshine on my day off, today. Riley is grumbling. He would have liked some dry sunshine also.
I have a call into the heat/oil service for a check on my boiler. It's running every 10 minutes and the water in the shower was as close to scalding as it's ever been, with the mix all the way to the cold side. This all happened while I was away at work yesterday. And my friend K needs the white with black print fabric I promised to send "as soon as I get home". It's been nearly 2 weeks. I have the fabric cut, folded and ready to pack. I did that right before my shower last evening. The really, really HOT shower.
I paid all the bills yesterday morning, balanced all three checkbooks (found the missing checkbook in the office, on the floor, under the ironing board), addressed envelopes, applied stamps and THEN remembered it was Columbus Day. No mail. I also made a huge pot of chicken soup for G to help with the cold he still has before going into work. I have a container of black bean bisque for myself.
Interesting thing about the missing checkbook. Sunday, while ironing G's shirts for work this week, I started thinking about the checkbook. I mean it was like a banner headline running in my head. And for some reason I decided to look in the closet at the beige shirts. I had to move the vacuum and the checkbook, plopped, and I looked down and there it was. I had used the vacuum last week and no checkbook plopped then. I was stunned. Pleased, but stunned.
I have been really trying to notice, pay attention etc to the intuitive side of my brain. It does have things to tell me. An example: I'm walking out the door and a thought pops in my head "did you turn off the _____?". If I go back in, I find that I have NOT turned it off. But, I don't always pay attention. And leave the oven on at 400 degrees for 24 hours.
If I keep thinking of something, then I need to really pay attention to that thought. The message of the missing checkbook's location was SO strong because I was practically standing on top of it.
Another interesting facet of my "brain" is that I never use a clock or watch and I am never late for any appointment UNLESS I have decided to wear my watch. I wake up when I need to wake up, with enough time to dress, eat and make my lunch. Isn't that interesting?
Another is that I can sense my brain "sorting" information I have collected, looking for the piece of information I want, need or am interested in remembering. As long as I stay calm. I can find papers in a pile and go directly to them. (but if I panic, all bets are off)
Once, at a job I had, they needed a certain work order and didn't have the number but had a general date. I thought about the order, walked directly to a file cabinet (I did all the filing), opened a drawer, held my hand over the files and picked one. And it was the one they needed. My supervisor treated me like an outer space alien from that moment on.
I was stunned that the order I pulled was the ONE!!! Still am. But I was very proud of myself.
So, anyway, the boiler repair guy is here just an hour after I called. He's in the crawl space looking around and probably won't find a thing. I have a feeling the problem might be in the shower mixer but that doesn't explain the boiler going on every ten minutes for over an hour last night. And I don't have the heating zones on yet. So only water is being heated.
In any case, I will be able to go to the post office when he's done and mail the fabric and buy stamps.
We're having pork, homemade applesauce, baked potatoes and fresh green beans for supper tonight. One of my favorite meals. I may even make cookies.
My bowl today is filled with intuitive thoughts. Edit: And VERY HOT WATER. The valve on the extra water tank is stuck open and I have been notified that I have 26 gallons of 155 degree water down there right now. The cute guy has gone to find a new valve. He doesn't know how far he will have to go to find one, but he'll return, he hopes. Me too. He did. And fixed everything.
I have a call into the heat/oil service for a check on my boiler. It's running every 10 minutes and the water in the shower was as close to scalding as it's ever been, with the mix all the way to the cold side. This all happened while I was away at work yesterday. And my friend K needs the white with black print fabric I promised to send "as soon as I get home". It's been nearly 2 weeks. I have the fabric cut, folded and ready to pack. I did that right before my shower last evening. The really, really HOT shower.
I paid all the bills yesterday morning, balanced all three checkbooks (found the missing checkbook in the office, on the floor, under the ironing board), addressed envelopes, applied stamps and THEN remembered it was Columbus Day. No mail. I also made a huge pot of chicken soup for G to help with the cold he still has before going into work. I have a container of black bean bisque for myself.
Interesting thing about the missing checkbook. Sunday, while ironing G's shirts for work this week, I started thinking about the checkbook. I mean it was like a banner headline running in my head. And for some reason I decided to look in the closet at the beige shirts. I had to move the vacuum and the checkbook, plopped, and I looked down and there it was. I had used the vacuum last week and no checkbook plopped then. I was stunned. Pleased, but stunned.
I have been really trying to notice, pay attention etc to the intuitive side of my brain. It does have things to tell me. An example: I'm walking out the door and a thought pops in my head "did you turn off the _____?". If I go back in, I find that I have NOT turned it off. But, I don't always pay attention. And leave the oven on at 400 degrees for 24 hours.
If I keep thinking of something, then I need to really pay attention to that thought. The message of the missing checkbook's location was SO strong because I was practically standing on top of it.
Another interesting facet of my "brain" is that I never use a clock or watch and I am never late for any appointment UNLESS I have decided to wear my watch. I wake up when I need to wake up, with enough time to dress, eat and make my lunch. Isn't that interesting?
Another is that I can sense my brain "sorting" information I have collected, looking for the piece of information I want, need or am interested in remembering. As long as I stay calm. I can find papers in a pile and go directly to them. (but if I panic, all bets are off)
Once, at a job I had, they needed a certain work order and didn't have the number but had a general date. I thought about the order, walked directly to a file cabinet (I did all the filing), opened a drawer, held my hand over the files and picked one. And it was the one they needed. My supervisor treated me like an outer space alien from that moment on.
I was stunned that the order I pulled was the ONE!!! Still am. But I was very proud of myself.
So, anyway, the boiler repair guy is here just an hour after I called. He's in the crawl space looking around and probably won't find a thing. I have a feeling the problem might be in the shower mixer but that doesn't explain the boiler going on every ten minutes for over an hour last night. And I don't have the heating zones on yet. So only water is being heated.
In any case, I will be able to go to the post office when he's done and mail the fabric and buy stamps.
We're having pork, homemade applesauce, baked potatoes and fresh green beans for supper tonight. One of my favorite meals. I may even make cookies.
My bowl today is filled with intuitive thoughts. Edit: And VERY HOT WATER. The valve on the extra water tank is stuck open and I have been notified that I have 26 gallons of 155 degree water down there right now. The cute guy has gone to find a new valve. He doesn't know how far he will have to go to find one, but he'll return, he hopes. Me too. He did. And fixed everything.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
More Sunday
I now wish I did not live at the far end of a dead end street. I wish I lived on a high traffic street so I could publicize my political view point to all passing cars.
From mid October to election day, here in Maine, I am taking notice of which homes are for or against equality in marriage for all citizens of this United States of America. And I would love to be helping the cause with my own signs. There is also a nasty race for Town Council to add spice to the season!
In Georgia, I noticed most telephone poles had a very nice "Obama Bin Lying" stapled to them. At first I thought it was Bin Laden. And I noticed, in the Atlanta airport, much disgust amongst the "white folk" whenever the President was on camera on CNN. And not so much applause as departing Army left for Iraq or Afghanistan. When Bush was President there was so much hoopla at the airport you would have thought Bush was walking by with the troops.
And on a less political note, while doing my usual grocery shopping I noticed an increase of an average of 10 cents per item across the board. Prices never went down after the $4 gas thing and now it seems, prices just go up every few months. My cereal was on the shelf. 6 boxes. So I took 4. Was $1.89 all summer and now $1.99. Frozen orange juice was $1.85 and is now $2.15 a can. The New York Times was $5 and is now $6. My sugar free Jello was $1.09 last week and is now $1.19 a box. Sugar was $2.50 for 5 #'s like usual. Chicken breasts were 99 cents a pound. I didn't buy any. I'm trying to empty the freezer cause I'm going to buy a new refrigerator someday soon.
The leftovers from my pot roast were delicious this evening. All I had to do was heat everything up. Easy.
From mid October to election day, here in Maine, I am taking notice of which homes are for or against equality in marriage for all citizens of this United States of America. And I would love to be helping the cause with my own signs. There is also a nasty race for Town Council to add spice to the season!
In Georgia, I noticed most telephone poles had a very nice "Obama Bin Lying" stapled to them. At first I thought it was Bin Laden. And I noticed, in the Atlanta airport, much disgust amongst the "white folk" whenever the President was on camera on CNN. And not so much applause as departing Army left for Iraq or Afghanistan. When Bush was President there was so much hoopla at the airport you would have thought Bush was walking by with the troops.
And on a less political note, while doing my usual grocery shopping I noticed an increase of an average of 10 cents per item across the board. Prices never went down after the $4 gas thing and now it seems, prices just go up every few months. My cereal was on the shelf. 6 boxes. So I took 4. Was $1.89 all summer and now $1.99. Frozen orange juice was $1.85 and is now $2.15 a can. The New York Times was $5 and is now $6. My sugar free Jello was $1.09 last week and is now $1.19 a box. Sugar was $2.50 for 5 #'s like usual. Chicken breasts were 99 cents a pound. I didn't buy any. I'm trying to empty the freezer cause I'm going to buy a new refrigerator someday soon.
The leftovers from my pot roast were delicious this evening. All I had to do was heat everything up. Easy.
A Very Nice Sunday in October
Yesterday I peeled, seeded and sliced three very small butternut squash. I think my weedy garden produced around 8 small butternuts this year. Anyway, after slicing them, I added some olive oil and salt and pepper and rubbed each slice and then drizzled the lot with pancake syrup. I do live here in one of the states that makes maple syrup but I don't like it. the pan then went in the oven at 425 for 50 minutes. Then I ate them all.
I also peeled, cored and sliced apples for a pie. The crumb crust on top is perfect but the filling is very liquidy and even though it all tastes good--it's not really a successful pie since I can't serve up a nice wedge to anyone. Just a scoop of glop.
The black bean bisque came out a bit too salty. Nice and deep and musky nevertheless but too salty. I was watching too many cooking shows and they all sprinkle salt like new fallen snow over everything. And then I do it. It will even out after I go grocery shopping today and buy more half and half or cream. The bisque is supposed to have cream in it. I used the last for G's tomato soup.
G is coughing all over the kitchen (he has a cold) so there are germs everywhere. He always gets sick. I am trying to stay as far away from him as I can.
I do want to plant my daffodil bulbs today, take a shower and either read or sew some little circles. No cooking. No dog walking.
I have to go to work tomorrow for the 12 to 6 shift. That means driving home in the dark again. I have astigmatism and night driving is difficult. I missed my turnoff on Friday and had to drive way out of my way to get to another turnoff near my home. That's the way it is in Maine. Only one chance to get home. All roads go north and south and very few go east and west. And then I still have to prepare a meal. I could follow K's example and have G bring home take out. And we could eat it while watching television (like we usually do-- only we watch the news and she watches taped soaps). K's husband is better at bringing home take out than my G is. And there is more local take out to choose from in her town in Georgia and R loves to shop. G hates take out because the food is never hot (just reheated) and he prefers to go out and eat. More expensive. I don't want to go out again after coming home.
As you can see, G and I have very little in common when it comes to food. We even eat different soups on soup night. And different lettuce and fixings in our salads on salad night. And entirely different pizza on pizza night (from the dough to the toppings). And when I fix chicken for him (his favorite meat) I have to make something else for me (I don't like chicken). This is what I LOVED most about my 10 day vacation. Not dealing with cooking. I could have the freedom of having a bowl of cereal for supper and not have to think of anyone else.
Now, if you think all that is difficult-- add in my daughter's likes and dislikes -- when she comes to eat, usually on holidays. Otherwise, she will eat any leftovers of my food (not her father's), unless I have added beans, rice, onion in recognizable form, nuts, bulgur, kale or beets. Which I add or say I have added when I feel passive/aggressive.
All right, I have vented enough for one day. I had oatmeal for breakfast today and when G asked if I had eaten, that's what I told him. Even though I had wanted blueberry pancakes and bacon.
We have leftover pot roast for later. And I can get something for lunch when I shop. But right now, I'm finishing my coffee and heading for the shower.
I also peeled, cored and sliced apples for a pie. The crumb crust on top is perfect but the filling is very liquidy and even though it all tastes good--it's not really a successful pie since I can't serve up a nice wedge to anyone. Just a scoop of glop.
The black bean bisque came out a bit too salty. Nice and deep and musky nevertheless but too salty. I was watching too many cooking shows and they all sprinkle salt like new fallen snow over everything. And then I do it. It will even out after I go grocery shopping today and buy more half and half or cream. The bisque is supposed to have cream in it. I used the last for G's tomato soup.
G is coughing all over the kitchen (he has a cold) so there are germs everywhere. He always gets sick. I am trying to stay as far away from him as I can.
I do want to plant my daffodil bulbs today, take a shower and either read or sew some little circles. No cooking. No dog walking.
I have to go to work tomorrow for the 12 to 6 shift. That means driving home in the dark again. I have astigmatism and night driving is difficult. I missed my turnoff on Friday and had to drive way out of my way to get to another turnoff near my home. That's the way it is in Maine. Only one chance to get home. All roads go north and south and very few go east and west. And then I still have to prepare a meal. I could follow K's example and have G bring home take out. And we could eat it while watching television (like we usually do-- only we watch the news and she watches taped soaps). K's husband is better at bringing home take out than my G is. And there is more local take out to choose from in her town in Georgia and R loves to shop. G hates take out because the food is never hot (just reheated) and he prefers to go out and eat. More expensive. I don't want to go out again after coming home.
As you can see, G and I have very little in common when it comes to food. We even eat different soups on soup night. And different lettuce and fixings in our salads on salad night. And entirely different pizza on pizza night (from the dough to the toppings). And when I fix chicken for him (his favorite meat) I have to make something else for me (I don't like chicken). This is what I LOVED most about my 10 day vacation. Not dealing with cooking. I could have the freedom of having a bowl of cereal for supper and not have to think of anyone else.
Now, if you think all that is difficult-- add in my daughter's likes and dislikes -- when she comes to eat, usually on holidays. Otherwise, she will eat any leftovers of my food (not her father's), unless I have added beans, rice, onion in recognizable form, nuts, bulgur, kale or beets. Which I add or say I have added when I feel passive/aggressive.
All right, I have vented enough for one day. I had oatmeal for breakfast today and when G asked if I had eaten, that's what I told him. Even though I had wanted blueberry pancakes and bacon.
We have leftover pot roast for later. And I can get something for lunch when I shop. But right now, I'm finishing my coffee and heading for the shower.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
The Zen of Saturday
Nothing scheduled but walking the dog. I have Saturday and Sunday off this week and next. Two days. Next to each other. It really is the simple things that have the most impact.
P says the Concord grapes are ready. On Sunday we'll pick them and see if there are enough for grape jelly making. She also has peaches on her tree. I tried peach preserves last year and they came out runny. Still good but would have been better if they had been thicker. The greenhouse customers with the promised "bushel of quince" haven't shown up so no quince preserves this year, either. I did manage two batches of zucchini bread and butter pickles. And NO freezer bags of cherry tomatoes this year. I usually have 10 to 12 quarts of frozen tomatoes. One or two bags for each month of winter suppers. Evidence of the year with no summer.
I do want to make a streusel topped apple pie today. And use lots of butter in the topping.
I made a pot roast yesterday and set it to cook out on the sun porch all day in the crock pot. It was delicious. I arrived home from work (in the dark) at 6:30 and peeled potatoes and made coleslaw while still wearing my coat. We ate just before 7:30. G has a cold and he finished washing the dishes and went directly to bed. I read the paper and watched Project Runway and fell asleep on the couch.
Riley is grumbling over there. Wanting his lunch and a walk. It's the least I can do.
I had mountains of stuff written and finally just deleted it all and wrote this. It was all rambling stuff without any meaning. I think the delete key is the most important key on this blog. Second to the "publish post" key.
My bowl today is filled with rest and rejuvenation. And perhaps some reading and pie baking. The sun has just appeared so the walk with Riley will be extra beautiful with all the fall colors.
Don't worry. I'm content. I may even roast a pile of butternut squash chunks for lunch.
P says the Concord grapes are ready. On Sunday we'll pick them and see if there are enough for grape jelly making. She also has peaches on her tree. I tried peach preserves last year and they came out runny. Still good but would have been better if they had been thicker. The greenhouse customers with the promised "bushel of quince" haven't shown up so no quince preserves this year, either. I did manage two batches of zucchini bread and butter pickles. And NO freezer bags of cherry tomatoes this year. I usually have 10 to 12 quarts of frozen tomatoes. One or two bags for each month of winter suppers. Evidence of the year with no summer.
I do want to make a streusel topped apple pie today. And use lots of butter in the topping.
I made a pot roast yesterday and set it to cook out on the sun porch all day in the crock pot. It was delicious. I arrived home from work (in the dark) at 6:30 and peeled potatoes and made coleslaw while still wearing my coat. We ate just before 7:30. G has a cold and he finished washing the dishes and went directly to bed. I read the paper and watched Project Runway and fell asleep on the couch.
Riley is grumbling over there. Wanting his lunch and a walk. It's the least I can do.
I had mountains of stuff written and finally just deleted it all and wrote this. It was all rambling stuff without any meaning. I think the delete key is the most important key on this blog. Second to the "publish post" key.
My bowl today is filled with rest and rejuvenation. And perhaps some reading and pie baking. The sun has just appeared so the walk with Riley will be extra beautiful with all the fall colors.
Don't worry. I'm content. I may even roast a pile of butternut squash chunks for lunch.
Friday, October 09, 2009
What I Really Want
A perfect day, week, month, year, lifetime for me would be the freedom and solitary enjoyment of my days, shared with the world via this or some other blog or written venue. And an audience.
I have maybe 20 to 30 "viewings" (which make it sound like a daily funeral), some of which are mine when I need to edit the copy for errors, some are my daughter when she checks to see if I have posted, my son, occasionally. The rest are my dear and faithful readers. You.
I am too old to share a "mommy blog". I do make art, but so infrequently as to not be the main focus of the blog anymore, if it ever was the focus. I could share pictures of food and recipes but others do that already with such flair and exuberance. I tried politics in real life and found that I don't have the strength for it.
My strength, in words, is emotional connection. Not therapy. More self examination of the emotional playing field that is daily life. The Zen of making order in the chaos that is our 24 hours each day.
Yesterday I got my hair cut. Short. And discussed the perception I have that the majority of people, men and women, do not like really short hair on women. I think it confuses them. They wonder about my sexual preferences. I have female associates who will not have lunch or dinner with me when my hair is very short, lest they be mislabeled as lesbians. This has more to do with their sexual problems than it has to do with me. Yet, I must deal with it. And eat my lunch alone or find new, more adventurous women to eat lunch with me. Just because I got my hair cut.
Now, I do have a co worker who thinks short hair on women makes their asses look huge. That thought may have more validity.
Today, my bowl is filled with smoke, as is my house. I seared the pot roast before slow cooking and the smoke has filled the house. All the windows are open and the fans are running. Ah, the joys of cooking!
I have maybe 20 to 30 "viewings" (which make it sound like a daily funeral), some of which are mine when I need to edit the copy for errors, some are my daughter when she checks to see if I have posted, my son, occasionally. The rest are my dear and faithful readers. You.
I am too old to share a "mommy blog". I do make art, but so infrequently as to not be the main focus of the blog anymore, if it ever was the focus. I could share pictures of food and recipes but others do that already with such flair and exuberance. I tried politics in real life and found that I don't have the strength for it.
My strength, in words, is emotional connection. Not therapy. More self examination of the emotional playing field that is daily life. The Zen of making order in the chaos that is our 24 hours each day.
Yesterday I got my hair cut. Short. And discussed the perception I have that the majority of people, men and women, do not like really short hair on women. I think it confuses them. They wonder about my sexual preferences. I have female associates who will not have lunch or dinner with me when my hair is very short, lest they be mislabeled as lesbians. This has more to do with their sexual problems than it has to do with me. Yet, I must deal with it. And eat my lunch alone or find new, more adventurous women to eat lunch with me. Just because I got my hair cut.
Now, I do have a co worker who thinks short hair on women makes their asses look huge. That thought may have more validity.
Today, my bowl is filled with smoke, as is my house. I seared the pot roast before slow cooking and the smoke has filled the house. All the windows are open and the fans are running. Ah, the joys of cooking!
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Trying to Reboot
Have you ever felt like you just don't "fit" anymore? Your clothes are too tight. Your friends aren't what you want and need. Your job is just blech. Groups you belong to make you wish you were somewhere else. Your breakfast cereal is tasteless and boring.
I'm looking around and mostly what I see and feel is discontent. I don't know what I want. I just know that what I have isn't working.
I could rearrange the furniture and change the slipcovers. I could drift over to Goodwill and look for a larger size pair of blue jeans. I could dig holes and plant things like I did on Tuesday.
I could go into "therapy" as a friend suggested because she was "worried" about me. I had vented my frustrations to her and instead of listening (and perhaps understanding) she decided I was in need of therapy.
Even my walk with the dog turned into a problem when we were followed by a dog on the loose, larger and more aggressive than my Riley, who nipped and growled and followed us all the way home. A metaphor for how I am feeling. Nipped and growled at by things larger and more aggressive than I am.
For the past eleven and a half years I have held jobs that have frustrated and angered me because I am helpless to change any of the circumstances of those jobs. I exchange my compliance for an hourly wage. I stay because of solidarity with my co workers who, because I have only a husband, two adult children and a dog as my friends and family, are all I have on a daily basis to connect with and talk to and eat lunch with. I had hoped the Art Club would work for me, to help network, but it seemed like panning for a gold nugget in a river of stones. A tremendous effort with no certainty of finding anything. Yes, I know we have to make this effort, but it's been a long time since I made the effort.
I have used pages in my journal with essays on "What Do I Want" and I am no closer to knowing what that is than I was when I began writing. I know that if I stop working, I will have shut myself off from the energy and wit of my co workers, and their youth, to what advantage? To spend more time watching West Wing, walking the dog, doing laundry and changing the slipcovers? Is that all there is?
The recent Master Gardener's potluck cast a spotlight on what it's like to actually be retired and have the entire day to devote to bulb planting, grass cutting, board meetings and discussing ways to recycle grass clippings, banana peels and rain water while creating a self sustaining eco system in our gardens to feed generations to come and not use a drop of fossil fuels. My own eco system is choked with weeds.
The Art Club is making small things from discarded little pieces of wood under the guidance of an artist making large things from little pieces of wood. My friend isn't interested in attending and my daughter said once was enough.
My husband and I are having one of the "not so happy" years of our long marriage. Each of us examining our own belly button lint with a keen eye.
The only Joy in my life is the evening meal. Last night it was reheated meatloaf and mashed potatoes to comfort me and Tomato Basil soup with handmade drop dumplings and cream for G. I was going to put a pot roast in the crock pot for tonight but have decided to have it tomorrow. Comfort after working until after 6 pm and driving home in the dusky light of the end of the day.
I have decided to get dressed and walk the dog (I hope, free of interruption), go to Target for underwear and a glass container for orange juice followed by a quick check of the blue jean section of Goodwill. Then a haircut. It isn't much but it's what I have. I'll make do.
Thanks for listening.
I'm looking around and mostly what I see and feel is discontent. I don't know what I want. I just know that what I have isn't working.
I could rearrange the furniture and change the slipcovers. I could drift over to Goodwill and look for a larger size pair of blue jeans. I could dig holes and plant things like I did on Tuesday.
I could go into "therapy" as a friend suggested because she was "worried" about me. I had vented my frustrations to her and instead of listening (and perhaps understanding) she decided I was in need of therapy.
Even my walk with the dog turned into a problem when we were followed by a dog on the loose, larger and more aggressive than my Riley, who nipped and growled and followed us all the way home. A metaphor for how I am feeling. Nipped and growled at by things larger and more aggressive than I am.
For the past eleven and a half years I have held jobs that have frustrated and angered me because I am helpless to change any of the circumstances of those jobs. I exchange my compliance for an hourly wage. I stay because of solidarity with my co workers who, because I have only a husband, two adult children and a dog as my friends and family, are all I have on a daily basis to connect with and talk to and eat lunch with. I had hoped the Art Club would work for me, to help network, but it seemed like panning for a gold nugget in a river of stones. A tremendous effort with no certainty of finding anything. Yes, I know we have to make this effort, but it's been a long time since I made the effort.
I have used pages in my journal with essays on "What Do I Want" and I am no closer to knowing what that is than I was when I began writing. I know that if I stop working, I will have shut myself off from the energy and wit of my co workers, and their youth, to what advantage? To spend more time watching West Wing, walking the dog, doing laundry and changing the slipcovers? Is that all there is?
The recent Master Gardener's potluck cast a spotlight on what it's like to actually be retired and have the entire day to devote to bulb planting, grass cutting, board meetings and discussing ways to recycle grass clippings, banana peels and rain water while creating a self sustaining eco system in our gardens to feed generations to come and not use a drop of fossil fuels. My own eco system is choked with weeds.
The Art Club is making small things from discarded little pieces of wood under the guidance of an artist making large things from little pieces of wood. My friend isn't interested in attending and my daughter said once was enough.
My husband and I are having one of the "not so happy" years of our long marriage. Each of us examining our own belly button lint with a keen eye.
The only Joy in my life is the evening meal. Last night it was reheated meatloaf and mashed potatoes to comfort me and Tomato Basil soup with handmade drop dumplings and cream for G. I was going to put a pot roast in the crock pot for tonight but have decided to have it tomorrow. Comfort after working until after 6 pm and driving home in the dusky light of the end of the day.
I have decided to get dressed and walk the dog (I hope, free of interruption), go to Target for underwear and a glass container for orange juice followed by a quick check of the blue jean section of Goodwill. Then a haircut. It isn't much but it's what I have. I'll make do.
Thanks for listening.
Sunday, October 04, 2009
Too Much Birthday
Not only were there too many candles on the cake, but there were way too many cakes! In fact, I still have a wedge of cake from the 18th of September in my fridge.
Now, if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you know I love a birthday. Especially my own birthday. And this year was extraordinary. So many email greetings, snail mail cards, hugs, smiles, gifts in the mail and of course the cake. All Chocolate.
I'm moving on to pie. Pizza pie. Which was what I fixed for supper last night after a long, cold, rainy day at work. G got the last of the bottled pizza sauce on his sausage, onion and mushroom pie so I had to be inventive with my supper. I had a whole wheat crust, olive oil, onion and Greek olives with plenty of salt and pepper. It was crispy and delicious. No. I didn't eat the whole thing. It takes several days for me to actually finish this large pizza. I sometimes have a wedge with my lunch salad. Or I have a larger piece as my supper on a leftover night.
I have a very old and stained pizza stone in the oven and that's how I get the crust so nice. I have also started stretching the dough over my hands instead of rolling it out flat and this seems to make the pizza nice and chewy. No doughy like bread. I also have a pizza peel which I liberally dust with coarse cornmeal to get things moving and not sticking. I like the crunch of the cornmeal on the bottom of the pizzas. My son didn't. Doesn't.
G is still sleeping so I'm waiting to start breakfast. While I was on vacation, K's husband would make Sunday breakfast. Eggs, bacon. potatoes, sausage and melon. No grits this time. I like grits. And they never let me make biscuits. Because they don't like having anyone else in the kitchen. K's husband makes everything separately. So the sausage is cold by the time he makes the eggs. If it was allowed, I would suggest putting everything in a 200 degree oven to stay warm until service. But my opinion isn't requested. This is the way things are always done. Period.
I've been tossed out of the kitchen on more than one occasion. "Get Out!" K can do things faster, she says, with out any help from me. Thank you very much.
Yesterday's "Bulb Class" went well. My co presenter did most of the heavy lifting, educationally, and I did the cookie plates, made the urn of coffee, ran out to Wally World for coffee cream and cat food, and helped with the "party favors" which consisted of a canning jar, rocks and a paperwhite bulb. I think we had 17 or 18 in the class. It went very well. And it was really raining outside. Cold and raining. And all the building's doors have to be wide open.
I work a new schedule next week. Monday, Wednesday, Friday. The late afternoon 12 to 6 part of the day on Monday and Friday. And the "dark times" are coming. Coming home in the dark is so depressing. But other people will be doing the morning watering of the greenhouse so that means dry socks for me. Got to look for the positive in everything.
My house in Ohio is no longer my house. It finally sold on Wednesday the 30th. I lost SO much (potential) money on this sale but as everyone keeps saying "You sold the house". So I'm going to think of it that way. Eventually. I do want to take a few days to yell and punch things and be angry. Get it all out. Then I'll be grateful. My dad's law firm sent it's bill for "services" at about the same time as the house sold. Happy Days.
Since it's cold and wet outside, I'll be doing indoor things here at home. Laundry, ironing and sewing. Riley has chewed a few holes into his toy animals so I'll be replacing the squeakers (which no longer squeak) with squeaky tennis balls and sewing the incisions and chewed areas closed. Rabbit. Spider. Square Bob. Dinosaur aka Pupasaurus.
My bowl today will be filled with cozy warmth and wool socks.
Now, if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you know I love a birthday. Especially my own birthday. And this year was extraordinary. So many email greetings, snail mail cards, hugs, smiles, gifts in the mail and of course the cake. All Chocolate.
I'm moving on to pie. Pizza pie. Which was what I fixed for supper last night after a long, cold, rainy day at work. G got the last of the bottled pizza sauce on his sausage, onion and mushroom pie so I had to be inventive with my supper. I had a whole wheat crust, olive oil, onion and Greek olives with plenty of salt and pepper. It was crispy and delicious. No. I didn't eat the whole thing. It takes several days for me to actually finish this large pizza. I sometimes have a wedge with my lunch salad. Or I have a larger piece as my supper on a leftover night.
I have a very old and stained pizza stone in the oven and that's how I get the crust so nice. I have also started stretching the dough over my hands instead of rolling it out flat and this seems to make the pizza nice and chewy. No doughy like bread. I also have a pizza peel which I liberally dust with coarse cornmeal to get things moving and not sticking. I like the crunch of the cornmeal on the bottom of the pizzas. My son didn't. Doesn't.
G is still sleeping so I'm waiting to start breakfast. While I was on vacation, K's husband would make Sunday breakfast. Eggs, bacon. potatoes, sausage and melon. No grits this time. I like grits. And they never let me make biscuits. Because they don't like having anyone else in the kitchen. K's husband makes everything separately. So the sausage is cold by the time he makes the eggs. If it was allowed, I would suggest putting everything in a 200 degree oven to stay warm until service. But my opinion isn't requested. This is the way things are always done. Period.
I've been tossed out of the kitchen on more than one occasion. "Get Out!" K can do things faster, she says, with out any help from me. Thank you very much.
Yesterday's "Bulb Class" went well. My co presenter did most of the heavy lifting, educationally, and I did the cookie plates, made the urn of coffee, ran out to Wally World for coffee cream and cat food, and helped with the "party favors" which consisted of a canning jar, rocks and a paperwhite bulb. I think we had 17 or 18 in the class. It went very well. And it was really raining outside. Cold and raining. And all the building's doors have to be wide open.
I work a new schedule next week. Monday, Wednesday, Friday. The late afternoon 12 to 6 part of the day on Monday and Friday. And the "dark times" are coming. Coming home in the dark is so depressing. But other people will be doing the morning watering of the greenhouse so that means dry socks for me. Got to look for the positive in everything.
My house in Ohio is no longer my house. It finally sold on Wednesday the 30th. I lost SO much (potential) money on this sale but as everyone keeps saying "You sold the house". So I'm going to think of it that way. Eventually. I do want to take a few days to yell and punch things and be angry. Get it all out. Then I'll be grateful. My dad's law firm sent it's bill for "services" at about the same time as the house sold. Happy Days.
Since it's cold and wet outside, I'll be doing indoor things here at home. Laundry, ironing and sewing. Riley has chewed a few holes into his toy animals so I'll be replacing the squeakers (which no longer squeak) with squeaky tennis balls and sewing the incisions and chewed areas closed. Rabbit. Spider. Square Bob. Dinosaur aka Pupasaurus.
My bowl today will be filled with cozy warmth and wool socks.
Friday, October 02, 2009
Home Sweet Home
I'm BACK!!! Yes, indeed. And the part of Georgia I visited did NOT have any flooding. Just heat and humidity. We got rained on a bit in the first part of the visit but after that, just one evening of rain (we were BBQing). Isn't it amazing that one part of the state can be a declared emergency zone and another just an hour away, has no troubles? Austell was the first place G and I lived when we moved to Georgia in the 60's and where we lived when Sam was born. It was flooded to the roof tops while I was on vacation.
I had a ripe and oh, so, juicy, Georgia peach every morning.
I had Grandmother Cobb's Vegetable Soup with skillet baked cornbread.
I had birthday cake. Several times.
I watched the soaps, with dinner on a tv tray, most evenings. They are switching babies and donating hearts on the one soap and adopting children without a DNA test on the other. It helped to have a delicious, icy Tom Collins before dinner. (:-))
Both my departures and arrivals were smooth and on time. My checked baggage was fresh roasted coffee beans on the way out and Publix creamer and candy (for G) on the way home.
I wish I could have slept late this morning, but I had to go to work. So tired. And it was so cold this morning. I have to work tomorrow also and my boss offhanded mentioned I was teaching the bulb class tomorrow. Can you imagine how exciting that was? NOT.
Riley and I picked raspberries out in the garden after work today. I picked high and he nibbled low.
The fence posts around the garden have rotted and are falling down, pulling the fencing down over the raspberry canes. The garden paths between raised beds are full of weeds. The beds are full of rotting and dry "stuff". I think maybe we are "too busy" to take good care of the garden and perhaps we should take it all down and just let grass grow back. It is just a mess.
I've got meatloaf in the oven and potatoes ready to boil and mash. Supper. And then West Wing to watch and some TiVo'd stuff. We'll be sound asleep by 9:30.
It's good to be home and sleeping in my own bed. Very good. I missed all of you!!!!
I had a ripe and oh, so, juicy, Georgia peach every morning.
I had Grandmother Cobb's Vegetable Soup with skillet baked cornbread.
I had birthday cake. Several times.
I watched the soaps, with dinner on a tv tray, most evenings. They are switching babies and donating hearts on the one soap and adopting children without a DNA test on the other. It helped to have a delicious, icy Tom Collins before dinner. (:-))
Both my departures and arrivals were smooth and on time. My checked baggage was fresh roasted coffee beans on the way out and Publix creamer and candy (for G) on the way home.
I wish I could have slept late this morning, but I had to go to work. So tired. And it was so cold this morning. I have to work tomorrow also and my boss offhanded mentioned I was teaching the bulb class tomorrow. Can you imagine how exciting that was? NOT.
Riley and I picked raspberries out in the garden after work today. I picked high and he nibbled low.
The fence posts around the garden have rotted and are falling down, pulling the fencing down over the raspberry canes. The garden paths between raised beds are full of weeds. The beds are full of rotting and dry "stuff". I think maybe we are "too busy" to take good care of the garden and perhaps we should take it all down and just let grass grow back. It is just a mess.
I've got meatloaf in the oven and potatoes ready to boil and mash. Supper. And then West Wing to watch and some TiVo'd stuff. We'll be sound asleep by 9:30.
It's good to be home and sleeping in my own bed. Very good. I missed all of you!!!!
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