Where Am I Going?

I have my new work schedule for next week. Three short days. I had expected two short days. When gasoline prices started going up (speculative buying of futures by the financial markets) the buying in retail stores stopped. Everyone has a short supply of money and if (and this is the fear) the financial bottom feeders push gas and oil back up to $3 and even $4 a gallon just to make money, well, the economy will certainly TANK big time. They stopped last summer when the government warned they would intervene. And gas and oil went down. FAST. It was all speculative and never based on production or supply. Just on greed. I hope the government actually does intervene this time. So people will come back and buy plants and keep me employed.

We had ONE glorious summer day yesterday. Now, today, it's cold and raining again.

G took Riley to the ocean to swim yesterday instead of cutting the grass. Riley had never been swimming before and it took him a little time to figure out what to do when the bottom disappeared. He swam and then decided he was done swimming and the two of them came back home. An adventure.

Today, I am bleaching my white towels and tee shirts, boiling the shower head in vinegar water, exchanging the winter bedding for summer bedding (optimistic), vacuuming the carpets with my Dad's vacuum and drinking coffee. I am seriously thinking of opening the door to my studio and actually spending some of the day in there. Doing something with fabric or paint. Kind of scary. I haven't done anything with fabric since February and that was only to cut out squares and circles for a travel project. I also have the last 12 by 12 project to work on. I missed the June 1st deadline.

Where am I going? I have so many things to think about. So many paths that are possible. I don't want to look back in 20 years and see the missed opportunity to change my life. I still refuse to call myself an artist. I am not a quilter. I will admit to being a gardener. And, though I love to cook, I will not call myself a cook. I also will not take the title of writer even though I think that is my true passion.

I started a new journal last week. I listed all the foreign places I have visited. My son was surprised (as I was) to remember how very many places we had been. My life, so far, has been an interesting adventure. I want to continue to be surprised and interested in what I do, where I live and who and where I visit.

I have, just now, decided to get my passport renewed.

I ordered new books from my library, on line, this morning. I am going to read again. Make time for reading, again.

I am going to try new recipes --- frequently. Lo Mein this week or even today. I enjoyed the Black Bean Bisque I made a few weeks ago. I think I should expand my culinary choices. I may make a new salad dressing for my lunch salads.

I may dye or print with dye on old tee shirts and linen shirts. Become more colorful. Less all white.

I am going to experiment with new ways of making things. I have been visiting the blog Spirit Cloth and have come away with a new way of seeing fabric art. I am always going to have some bit or piece of fabric to hand stitch or print or write on. Right next to the journal.

I'm going to try. I'm going to fail. I'm going to change. I'm going to grow. I have no one to impress but myself. I am free to reinvent myself (as I have done all my life). I think this is where I was heading when I began the 365 day Healthy Eating Plan. I wanted to lose the weight and be "ready" to begin a new life. And I am ready, now.