I am being pissy again today. And I know why. Change is coming. I don't like change. But I can feel it coming my way. Intuitively. Like the physic hotline. Things are going to change. My horoscope for the last little while has been saying I should be preparing. Making decisions.
This isn't something I am excited to learn. I don't even like having to buy a new brand or style of underpants.
So, of course, I am not getting ready. As if I even knew what it was I should be getting ready ... for. Is that even a sentence? I did do something remarkable in the past two days. I wore a sleeveless shirt to work. The flappy, old lady arms were in full view. And they are now sunburned. Shorts, also. So my legs are sunburned. And no socks. Total rebel.
Perhaps the change that is coming is the future content of this blog. I have this nagging feeling that I am boring all of you. That I should have more interesting topics of conversation. Or perhaps, actual gardening tips and stories. Recipes. Tutorials on something. I have no idea what. But I feel I should be more interesting. I feel I should be doing more interesting things. I think they used to call this "Important Business". Here I am again wondering what I should be when I grow up. And, it's really time, don't you think?
I've been off reading other, new to me, blogs and I find that the kind I like reading are the ones with a "story". Usually, short stories. One blogger purchased an old recipe file box and pulls out a recipe, makes the item (usually a dessert) and then tells a story relating to the baked goods. Others have stories about objects they cherish. Another shows me what she has found in her pocket. Or on the street. Debris lined up and photographed. Her found items always so much more interesting than mine. (perhaps I need to learn to look?) Others have taken me on vacation with them to far away places or just around the corner.
Each of these new blogs makes me feel too solitary. Too closed off. Too alone. Too self absorbed. Too complacent. I don't think anyone would be leaning forward. glued to the computer screen, waiting for my next word. Too weird.
Interesting things to report: Ice maker acting cranky and refusing to make ice cubes. The new work schedule was posted and some coworkers discovered their names were NOT on it. That's how they found out their "season" had ended. One was working her last day in the greenhouse today (she called out) and the other is working her last day tomorrow (it's going to rain and I bet she calls out). And the remaining troops are restless. Been more than three years and no raises. M goes out everyday at lunch and buys the $2 Taco Bell special. Burrito, chips, drink. $2. I asked him to get me one. I only wanted the chips and drink and I said he could have the burrito. When it's 90 to 100 degrees in the greenhouse, I crave salt and a beverage with ice. M refuses to let me pay since he ate the burrito. Oh, dear. And my hips hurt so much today that I was walking (limping) like an old crone. After sitting down for 30 minutes (first time all day) to eat my lunch with chips and diet Pepsi, I could barely walk to my locker. I had to hold onto the counter. This was a first. I had waited too long to take a pill. I won't make that mistake again. Time for bed. To dream of change.