Tuesday, March 26, 2019

Daily Notes- March 26th


A very old piece that surfaced a few weeks ago and is now on the wall behind my chair.  The center is that Walmart Black of long ago that bleached to the soft off white.  The center is the paper circle from a new pre-wound bobbin.  The black is rubbed and painted with rusty color.   I may have had this on the blog --but I can't remember anymore.  It's an image I took with the phone a week ago.  Before.

Storm brewing?  The yellow threads always make me think of energy.

Re-entry after Week Four.

I didn't enjoy the news and shut the television off.  I read a few blog posts. I wrote one.  I got two emails.  I answered them.  I had a long phone call.  I researched building raised beds to see how we could add taller sides.  Perhaps we won't.  Just work with what we have for one more year and then decide.  I sat in silence.  Resting.  Not really wanting to give up the quiet.

As I just wrote to Grace, I am off to the grocery store-- once the furnace guy arrives to do the annual furnace cleaning--to buy trucked in zucchini, onions and red bell peppers and make a batch of bread and butter pickles to process.  We are out of pickles.  And waiting until July or August seems rather stupid.  I didn't make pickles last summer.  The Summer of my Discontent.  Which became my Winter of Discontent.  And if I don't shake things up-- will become my Spring of Discontent.

Week Five is asking "what do you want?  What do you really WANT?".  What things have you always thought were "not for me" but I wished they were for me.  I need to work myself away from "this is who I am" to this is "who I wanted to be".   Think about Maybe.   List five things--what would I do if it didn't sound too crazy?

Since I tend to live WAY FAR from anything even slightly "crazy" this is not going to be an easy list to assemble.  The craziest I have gotten was to chose bright red eyeglass frames.  But I do admit they have made me very very happy!

I have never felt I was worthy of anything more in Life.  A Palm Reader once said "you will have enough but never more".  Perhaps if I had defined "Enough" differently thru my Life Time?

I see that I am living the Unexamined Life.  I have lots of things to work on and dig for this week.  And the puzzle.  It's the source of so much frustration and it opens me up to thinking about-- My Biggest Worry.  And what is that?

1 comment:

grace Forrest~Maestas said...

I sat in silence resting