Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Wednesday Morning @ Bleak House

The view into the sink. (I am loving the scratches in the stainless sink, the coffee grounds and the sky reflecting in the water in my cereal bowl) So far, I have slept later than ever.  10am.  I made coffee and just noticed that the coffee maker "warmer" has stopped functioning.  The light over the computer no longer works.  The dog already expects to be going for a walk.  Today was "cereal" day and I ate my bowl of cereal without any enjoyment.  My house is cold.  It is warmer outside.  A day of lower than usual expectation of happiness.  A day to consider buying replacements.

Dinner last night materialized out of nothing.  Some rice in the rice cooker.  Some frozen chicken tenders in the toaster oven.  Some frozen peas in the microwave.  I had reheated beets instead of rice.  A central part of the meal had to be run into the disposal as it had grown furry mold while waiting to be consumed.  I should just freeze leftovers.

House didn't record.  I got Terra Nova instead.  I also lost the last 5 minutes of the Good Wife.  Mercury must be in retrograde or something.  I did watch Project Runway from last week.  The black dress was nicely made but with no way in or out of it was it good design?  I know there are designer dresses that have to be sewn closed with the person inside.  So this isn't new territory. It did suit the raven.

I had plenty to do at work yesterday.  A load of projects and expectations.  Better than having none. I have things to do here at home as well.  Things I have let slip and slide.  I need to make a list and check things off.  I also need to go into town and pay our property tax bill.  Return library books.  Buy more salad ingredients and another quart of Egg Beaters for breakfast.  I have kale out in the garden and can start making the egg thing I was eating at the beginning of the new diet.  Sort of a frittata.

I feel oppressed. Not depressed.  Weighed down in body and mind.  Pressed by obligations.  Heaviness. It could just be fatigue.  It could be the change of seasons.  It could, finally, be the reality of being SIXTY FIVE.  I noticed the folding crepe of my upper arms this morning as I pulled on my socks.  That, in itself, was enough to dampen my spirits.  But the difficulty putting on my right sock?  Sad.

Anyway, I won't burden you with all of my navel gazing today.  I'll just move right along with my housekeeping projects (laundry, shirt ironing, bed sheets, floor cleaning), walk the dog, drive into town and be done with the day.  Work tomorrow.  I will try and find something to do that will bring joy and sun into my life.  After all, the rest of the week it will be raining.

4 pm Update:   I purchased a new coffee machine, just in case, the old one is actually, truly, deeply, dead. I also purchased toilet paper and some off brand Spanx.  Renewed my library card and got a new Swedish mystery.  The Tudor book is hard to get into.  I try but it seems more literate than I am.  Now I plan to walk the dog--hoping it won't rain until we get home.  The sky and clouds are dark grey and stormy looking.  Can't watch the missed episode of House for 8 days.  Fox Rules.  Watched the last 5 minutes of Good Wife that I missed.  Good thing I did.  The last 5 minutes changed everything.

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