The Good Wife of 1955

I got this as an email and laughed so hard. Could the 1950's woman have read this with a straight face. It's very "Pleasantville".

1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before. This is a way to let him know that you have been thinking of him and his needs. ( see #3)

2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest and you'll be refreshed when he arrives. ( I'd prepare myself but not by resting-- I'm thinking Tequila)

3. Don't complain if he's late coming home for dinner or even stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he may have gone through during the day. (I'd count this as a good reason to change the locks)

4. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash their faces and hands. Change their clothes and keep them quiet. (drugs or duct tape?)

5. Be happy to see him. ( Now why would you be happy? This guy is not contributing to your happiness on little bit. )

6. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. (LOL, if my husband had been greeted by a warm smile during those "bumpy" times, he would have run, screaming from the house.)

7. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but let him talk first. Remember his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
( No comment. Nothing I have to say is important)

8. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure. ( are you thinking "lap dance"?)

9. Have a cool drink ready for him. (!)

10. Arrange his pillow and take off his shoes. ( how many of you are arranging that pillow over his face?)

11. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember he is the master of the house and as such will always exercize his will with fairness and truthfulness.

12. A good wife always knows her place.

I think I'll just revert to the "Pirate's Code of Conduct" on this one. Savvy?