Sunday, May 31, 2015
I have lived most (all) of my life putting things off until "someday" and this fever I have had has sort of caused me to think--is this, now, someday? Or have I missed "someday" and gone directly to "too late now".
I have (will have) been home rather than at work for four full days. It feels like weeks. It feels good. I have forgotten about work and haven't worried or fretted about what I may have "missed". I have rested. While the fever was attacking--I tossed and turned. But once it passed--I rested.
Just sitting. Letting time pass and wash over me. No time clock to punch. No place to be. Not even any meals to prepare. G and I just stopped eating it seems. I remember making food on Monday and Tuesday. G must be eating that. I have existed on well spaced cheese sandwiches. On hamburger buns. Just two slices of cheese and the bun. No heat, no toasting, no condiments. Each bite taking forever to chew until I had to fall asleep from the effort. Looks like I had 4 of them over 3 days.
The house is being painted. There are so many decisions to make. This color here or here? These two side by side? What about this? I fear I am making all the WRONG choices and the house will look like a JOKE. Good thing we have so many trees.
I am going out to a friend's right now--in the car. For tea and to look at books. Should be enough excitement to generate a nap when I get home.