Another art quilt blogger has self ignited. She wrote an emotional, intense post and created a firestorm of indignant and angry protest. I expected the protest. I was surprised by the 87 comments (and counting) that she got. People were defensive, felt diminished and responded in anger. They even resorted to name calling. Gosh, it sounds like the GOP debates.
Who would think that the simple (ha) joy of stitching small bits of cloth together would (could) arouse such vigorous Modern protest?
I, myself, have written things better left unsaid. Recently. It usually happens when I am overtired and bored. I have saved myself from too much apology and embarrassment (but still enough to be uncomfortable) by rushing back to the computer and hitting the delete button. There is nothing wrong with writing a rip roaring attack post. Just don't publish it.
I have a few rules that I try to follow. The first one: don't make comments. This is hardest of all since I want to communicate. But the problem of commenting is "interpretation". I am saying "this" but you are reading "that". I have hurt a great many bloggers by making a comment they didn't appreciate.
Second: stop reading the blogs that incite me to make comments. Incite. There are blogs out there that cause me to think of other ways of doing things. Blogs that make me smile. Sweet posts. Etc. But, then, there are idiots and jackasses out there writing things that make me want to pick up the computer and throw it against the wall. I need to stop reading those. Forever.
Third: Mommy Blogs. Those 30 something, Moms, out there with their 40K kitchens, fabric lines, product lines,very young children, always selling something. I can look. It's like a traffic accident. We know it's a bad thing to do, but we look anyway. Just don't stay around. Walk by, really fast. I think I was JUST as annoying in my 30's and 40's (but my children were in high school not diapers). But I'm 65 and just think it's such ..... crap, now. I made formula, boiled bottles, soaked and washed cloth diapers. I get it. You think you invented this. You didn't.
Fourth: The really good blogs that make me think, show me new ways of doing things, make me consider alternatives to the way I am living my life. Read more of these. Read. Learn. Process.
Fifth: Enjoy the readers I do have and enjoy the comments they leave which are always pleasant to find in my email box. You, readers, know how to do "comments". Thank you.
Totally hear you on the mommy blog thing. I am embarrassed to think how self righteous I felt back then. But then, we did make a difference didn't we? Without our generation the new bloggers probably wouldn't feel as comfortable sharing their awe. And what a wonder it is to be ABLE to throw it all out there.
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how people's personalities and issues and communication skills (or lack thereof) can come through so clearly in blogging? I think there are people who like igniting controversies and then sitting back to watch the conflagration ... And I suppose that some consider themselves as providing the service of "raising the issues" and "fostering discussion." Sort of like the Rick Santorums of the blog world. :-)
ReplyDeleteBut me, I think life is too short and I want to follow the stuff that makes me feel GOOD, not bad. I guess it's why my blogroll is an ever evolving thing. :-)
Hi Joanne,
ReplyDeleteJust back from my trip.
I know which blog you reference and I couldn't believe the nasty things that were said in comments. Personal attacks! Are we in 5th grade?
I got what the writer was saying but it's not the first time she has done this type of post and not the first time she got skunked. She may be a great person in real life but her method is very blunt and generalized. You would think that someone with her artistic talent would be able to avoid painting everyone with the same brush. Even her apology was a little half assed. She posted someones work without asking and without saying what blog it was from. Not nice.
Still, some of the venom that came through in the comments was childish and as bad as the means girls in high school. Very sad that we can't seem to get along and enjoy each others art without being unkind. There's a way to respond and comment but in many cases manners are a lost art.