Field Notes- It's cold in the house. G is rolled up in a down lap thing- asleep on the couch at noon.

 I have apples on the list for tomorrow.  French Apple Cake.  Includes Rum. And Butter. So why not. These are the sort of apples that taste good.  Banged up, not perfect, spotted.  Definitely not waxed. The kind you pick up off the ground under the apple tree.  Patty must not have gone apple picking.  One year the Twins brought me a bag of apples.  I know they went apple picking...but none for me.  Their dad bakes the apple cake recipe I gave him.  I baked it when I was a child. It's OLD.

I need to go down to the closet and pull out the red sweater.  And the corduroy pants with the surface over my butt worn smooth and shiny.  And thin.  At some point I will need to layer and stitch something over the seat of those pants.  Quilt them. Sam got me a heavy new pair of corduroy pants at Goodwill. I should start breaking them in.

I got the third and fourth........I stopped typing because my brain has forgotten the word for what these things are that I sew around the == border....  It came back.  It works if I just describe the word and it's use....mostly.  I think it's because I read, watch tv and sew.   I don't talk or write if I am not here with you or writing the washing machine pages once a week..  I've lost my "words".  I sewed the last two strips around the square.  This last border is finished and I ironed it all very flat with two applications of spray starch before going to bed..  There is nothing straight or uniform about this square.  Wonky.

All day, the only talking is inside my head.  Alone.  It's been that way for- well always.  Why?  Why do I do that?  Is that why I like books? Reading them.  Someone else is talking in my head?  And I can rest and just "listen".  Yes.  If I am describing insane...then yes... I am. It's my natural habitat.

We are having pizza.  With football. Like always. If G wasn't watching...I'd also have wine.  But he'll be watching.....  Too bad it's almost Winter.  Patty usually arrives with Gin and Tonics. In warm weather.

In winter it's a large bottle of red wine.  Which I appreciate.