Heavy Sadness

I am struggling to find my footing.  I have a tree that needs lights.  I have cookies to bake. I have soup to make now that it has snowed for the first time this winter.  Yet, here I sit.  Just staring at nothing.  The world is such a hurtful place right now.  I can't watch or read any more about the poor children. There is a funeral mass about to start (here in my town) for the son of someone I have known for many years.  I remember checking books out to this young man when I worked at the library.  He must have been 6 or 7. A young adult now.  Perhaps in college.

This must be how my dad felt in those last years.  Watching people younger than he, dying before him.

I will do what I can today.  Tomorrow it's back to work.

It's now a few hours later:  I am working on the cookie dough.  Snickerdoodles.  The Lentil soup with Pumpkin is the strangest I have ever made.  The organic green lentils are still "crispy" to the tooth and even the carrots are crunchy.  Been simmering for over an hour and I keep adding water to help things along.  The is a great deal of ingredients  to trash if the lentils don't get soft.  Might be my last time to buy "organic".