Friday, October 22, 2010

Gathering Lost Fragments

Clementines.  These are tiny ones that come in a bag and not the larger ones that come in those wooden boxes.  Harder to peel but spicy, sort of, and very good.  Clementines are the transition fruit for me. It is now nearly Winter, even though the grocery still has peaches, plums and mangos from California and Chile.  I am taking a big handful to work today, to perfume my day with citrus aromas.

Diet.This morning, before my first cup of coffee, I had two thoughts.  One, taped a note to the dryer (at eye level) that reads: Do Not Wash Dog Towels with People Clothes.  G.  Second: During 8.5 months of the 365 Day Diet, I didn't eat more than two meals a day.  I would eat breakfast very late, go to work at the library (1 to 4 or 1 to 5) and then eat dinner with G at 6:30 or 7.  I would have a good breakfast and a good dinner and still be under 1200 calories for the day.  If I did eat lunch out with a friend, I skipped breakfast and had a salad for dinner.

Now: I am eating lunch and not having time each day to walk 3 miles with the dog.  Guess what? I am gaining weight.  It's freezing cold this morning but I may dress and walk the dog and then go to work.  It's hell on the knees and hip but it has to be done, right?  The reason it's hell is the concrete floors at work and the fact that I am always standing or walking at work on those unforgiving floors.  And I'm 64.  I was 59 when I was on the diet.  And taking pain pills each and every day I walked the dog.

Art. The 12 by 12 challenge is due November first.  I painted the fabric weeks ago and have a scattering of ideas on what I want to make.  Today I may dig into the shiny fabric drawer and see if I have anything that makes me interested in using it. And look into the felt bag.  I am thinking of several different textures this time, different surface levels.

Television and Books.  I am caught up on Fringe episodes.  Good Stuff.  And G managed to stay awake to watch NCIS, Castle and House from this week.  I still have two Wallander's from PBS to watch and my Peter Hoeg book, Borderliners.  Danish author.  I need to reserve some books for G this morning.

Life.  It seems good right now if I don't fret about the size of my rear end.  We are all counting down to Christmas Eve as the last day we work (anticipating the winter layoff).  G and I are having a good year, relationshipwise, but G has asked how much longer he has to work (Medicare!!)  Dog is good.  The house needs updating if it's to be sold and make us money.  New bathrooms, carpets, windows and kitchen floor. Paint.  We aren't planning to sell and move, but still, we need to think ahead.  2010 brought a new roof and new front steps. Sleeping more.  Tired more often.  Still wish I got more email from interesting people.  (I know, I need to send more to get more).  Good haircut this time.

Blog and Work.  Sixty more posts and I will have my 1000.  I so look forward to typing these inane sentences for you to read.  Taking pictures.  Being connected to people.  Being myself.  At work, no one cares to know anything about me. Really. They know nothing and that is fine with them.  I stood at the back door to the greenhouse on Tuesday, thinking about just walking out, getting in the car and driving away. Not saying anything to anyone.  I stood there thinking about how long, if ever, before anyone realized I was gone. Not just out of radio contact. Gone. And would it matter to any of them?

6 comments:

  1. interesting thoughts. I think it is different being an older worker. I am mostly invisible to the kids I work with. Something to do with the youth culture, which is in complete denial of aging as a normal inevitable process-if you are going to stay amongst the living.
    So- keep writing. I am a subscriber but do not comment because I am strapped for time and pretty boring anyway. I also feel it is a connection to the world that I do not experience in my actual day to day existence. Maybe by choice. martha

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  2. I feel like the world in general is disrespectful to older folks. When I was growing up you would never think of insulting an older person.

    Now on local tv they have a commercial for their morning program that says something like - not your grandmother's morning show - seriously she hates us.

    So is this to indicate that you're really wonderful and a smart and hip person if you watch because you should never be caught watching something your grandmother would watch.

    I hear insults all the time on older folks. All the talking heads want to cut social security out. And Medicare. Well if I made millions like they do I wouldn't care if it was around or not.

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  3. I sure am glad you blog, because I love to read what you write. And your photos are wonderful as well.

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  4. I agree with the comments about being an older worker. I find some of the younger ones sorely lacking. Ever notice they can't make change unless the register tells them what to give back???
    Concrete floors kill me, too.

    I love this blog. It's the first one I check when I go online.

    Sometimes funny, sometimes sarcastic, most times both! Love it. Keep going.

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  5. At my last regular job I was one of a group of "older" employees. We worked hard. We met our deadlines. We enjoyed our work and each other. We progressed the mission forward. We got little respect from the 30ish group of well-educated, hotshots in the office. They were certain we did not know what they knew. They were always hassled, rushed and behind schedule and treated the rest of us like we were invisible, until they needed our help to fish them out of a mess. It was so demoralizing that it was one of the main reasons I left. The 30 somethings are now pushing 40, have all moved on and are well on their way to invisibility themselves. I wonder if they will remember how it was when they felt so superior? I guess it is the way of the world.

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