Friday, January 22, 2010

The Good, Bad And The Ugly

Yesterday turned out okay. I got to Joann's and bought elastic cord, crimps and bead pins in assorted sizes. Used a coupon. $6. And plenty of opportunities in that bag of stuff for creative play. I also bought a new (to me) pair of charcoal grey cords @ Goodwill. I misspelled it as charcola and kind of like that name. And the color it suggests. Anyway, the pants are nearly the same ugly , light sucking grey as the Orvis kanga sweatshirt I bought. A co-ordinating outfit to wear around the house.

Things are still a wreck in the studio. But over in the back left corner which you can't see, it's almost empty. I have the batts over here in the kitchen now, waiting for boxes, labels and a trip to the post office. I will be returning to this heap later this morning. I also ventured into the attic storage room and sorted through 8 or 10 boxes of fabric and pulled every piece of solid fabric for Deborah and her 4th grade quilt project. The former owner of this fabric is smiling all the way from heaven. I just know it. Feel it.

I broke my sewing machine needle stitching the bottom hems of two pair of cords last night. The major problem with putting on weight: your pants get shorter. So I have been unhemming my pant legs and getting some much needed length that way. They weren't all that long to begin with as I am wearing men's pants. Men's pants are made out of better fabrics.

Today marks the beginning of the second week of my diet. A milestone. I haven't been able to diet for an entire week since 2007. I've needed to but haven't had the willpower or determination for it. Now I do. There is no positive reinforcement (for me) in results. In 2007, I didn't notice a difference for almost 2 months. That is really difficult. Hard to stay with it when you see nothing happening. Then I noticed my pants felt longer. That was all I noticed. It amazes me that I continued but I had decided from the beginning to do 365 days without any concern for a target weight. If at the end, I had lost only 5 pounds, I would have still kept going. It was a tremendous effort. A need to change. A leap of faith. But in 6 weeks, at the doctor's office, I discovered I had lost 14 pounds. I couldn't see it, but obviously something was changing. The diet started at the beginning of January and I bought my first new clothing purchase (pants) in late April almost May. I purchased another pair of pants and a shirt in early August. After that, I had tremendous fun trying on clothes just to see what size I was. I only bought a few things usually a Goodwill. I was unprepared for success.

Now, I am only wanting to return to those happy days of August, 2007. I now know that I can NEVER eat the way regular people do. I have returned to watching thin people eat. Do you know that thin people really don't eat. They order food, nibble at it and then just move it around their plate. They cut food and stack it on their forks and then push it off. They never take the remains home. They talk. They spend the meal talking. Using their hands. Being busy with everything but eating. Yes, they will attack the plate of food with gusto in the first few minutes. But, the gusto is short lived. I watched a woman with a plate of pasta drenched in cream sauce last night.

I had plenty of time to watch as food service was so slow that several tables gave up and left the restaurant before any food had arrived. Ruby Tuesday. If you own stock, sell it. By 7.45 the restaurant was empty. Our waiter said the kitchen had gotten slammed. Too bad. I ate my steak without the baked potato. Which arrived after I was finished eating. Along with the sauce that went with my husband's dinner. And the reason he had ordered that particular dish.

The woman with the penne pasta ate one noodle. Then she folded her hands in her lap and talked to the guy eating massive amounts of quesadilla across from her. Then she picked up her fork and speared a little piece of broccoli. Hands back in her lap. Then another noodle. Her dinner consisted of about 10 noodles covered in thick cream sauce and some little broccoli florets. And then she was done. Meanwhile, I was eating my petite sirloin sans baked potato without butter and steamed broccoli.

Today Invisible Fence is coming to see why Riley's collar won't zap him anymore. G has taken the collar and the zap machine to the Invisible Fence office and both work there. Not here. So we had to pay them $85 to come and see what's wrong. If anything. They'll be here at 10.30.

I'm having English Breakfast tea and my cold baked potato from last night, for breakfast. Almost time for the dog fence people to arrive. Then Riley gets his lunch and his walk. And I get to do something I want to do. What will that be?

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