Junk In The Trunk

No Pictures. Please!

Went shopping with the daughter yesterday and we tried on jeans at the local Gap Outlet. Not much in the way of choices so we moved to the men's jeans. I tried on (squeezed into) a pair of 32 by 32 distressed jeans. I have never been that comfortable with the "wedgie" look in jeans but my daughter says we must "wedgie" to get "lift".

Well, I had "lift". My daughter and the cute teenager in charge of the dressing rooms suggested I try and sit down. I did. They then said I should cross my legs. I did. And the two of them agreed the jeans were "tight enough, but not too tight". In other words, just right.

Whoa, Nelly. "Tight enough"? Yes, that is the way they buy them. Because....... after wearing them for an hour or four, the jeans will loosen up. And I guess fit.

If you buy them already "loosened up", in a few hours they will be baggy. Which is what I have been doing. They fit in the dressing room and after a few hours of wear they bag in the back. I had been thinking they would shrink in the washer and dryer. All my "fat lady" jeans did. But now I'm thinking maybe they didn't. Maybe I just kept getting bigger.

The dressing room teenager reported that the jeans will not shrink. They just return to whatever fit they had when we buy them (pre wear). Again, this is what I have noticed in the new smaller jeans. Each time they come out of the dryer--I'm happy with them -- until I sit down and stretch out the seat.

I did NOT buy the GYN-o jeans. I could feel a yeast infection developing while trying them on.

I was happy to hear how I could achieve "lift' and a nice round bit of "junk in the trunk" without plastic surgery. But, (!) to be honest, what would I be doing, and where would I be doing it, and with whom, that needs "junk in the trunk"? And why at age 61.

What's Good Today: Nachos Grande with guacomole for lunch. It was SO nice to be eating something SO BAD after SO LONG. I kinda wish I'd had a big Margarita with them. Now I have to "degrease" before my blood test for cholesterol. I hope 30 days is enough. Size 10 jeans that fit (before the nachos). The newest Quilting Arts magazine to read. G walking the dog all weekend. Jane Austen's Mansfield Park on PBS tonight.

What's Not: G walking the dog all weekend means I'm not walking at all. Returning "T" is for Trespass without reading the last 20%. I think that means the book wasn't too good. Maybe because Kinsey didn't eat any QP's with Cheese. Is everyone on a diet?